The author of the above written letter points out that the level of cortisol hormone secreted by the body is higher in firstborn infant monkeys and humans. The author also state that first time pregnant mother monkeys also had a higher level of cortisol in their bodies, but this letter does not provide enough data to convince the editor of these facts since it is rigged with assumptions. There might be a number of possible alternative explanations that lead to these claims.
The author has not given any information on those 18 rhesus monkeys being studied. There is no evidence that proves this study was conducted and even if it did, whether it was reliable. It is possible that the study was conducted in an area which wasn't favorable for this species of monkeys which might've triggered this release of cortisol hormone as a sort of defense mechanism. Author also doesn't provide the timespan in which this study was conducted, whether it was constant or taken at particular intervals of time. Those high level of cortisol might be imminent even before the stimulant occurs. So there is no way to be sure that this release of cortisol was directly linked to the situation of stimuli.
This time the author focuses on firstborn humans stating that they have relatively high cortisol levels too. Firstly, humans are way more complex in their physiological traits than monkeys. Secondly, we can't compare apples with oranges because that's exactly what the author did in this transcript. Humans, being quite a complex species that they are, have many different emotions, triggers which causes the release of various hormones which may be the case for this release of cortisol. The living conditions of these 2 mammals are also quite varied and different. That is the reason why there can't be a comparison between monkeys and humans.
In the conclusion of this letter the author states that first time mother have a higher cortisol levels than those who have done it multiple times. This doesn't necessarily imply that first born monkeys have higher cortisol levels. This might happen because of the mother experiencing the sensation of child birth for the first time and this acting as a stimuli triggers the release of cortisol in their bodies which indirectly proves that levels of cortisol may not be directly connected with birth order of the babies. There might also be another explanation that cortisol level secretions decrease with age or every time it gets released, the subsequent time that it's triggered just releases a lower amount of the hormone. This is the reason why we can't say for sure that first born monkeys have higher cortisol release that their younger counterparts.
The writer also mentions that this study is "recent" but he doesn't give any additional evidence suggesting the amount of time elapsed after this study. If this study was conducted a decade ago then multiple factors play a part in this phenomenon such as geographical conditions like environment, climatic changes, etc. For example this study might've been conducted in a hazardous environment since the writer has also not mentioned the testing conditions. This may in-turn be the reason of higher cortisol release in the first born because of them being more sensitive to these changes. So we need more evidence surrounding this study and we need statistical data on these rhesus monkeys that are being monitored.
Lastly we can see that the author of this letter is presuming things based off of some studies which are quite vague and ambiguous. This is the reason why we need to steer clear of these mis-informative articles and studies which may lead to a mass-belief system based on false pretenses. We need be more aware of the current situations and stop spreading information with no evidence backing it up. Always read from trusted sources and ignore unreliable info.
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: ??? out of 6
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 28 15
No. of Words: 652 350
No. of Characters: 3188 1500
No. of Different Words: 275 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 5.053 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.89 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.461 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 234 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 160 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 101 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 59 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.286 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.274 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.714 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.293 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.44 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.132 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 247, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: wasn't
...he study was conducted in an area which wasnt favorable for this species of monkeys w...
^^^^^
Line 2, column 392, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
... sort of defense mechanism. Author also doesnt provide the timespan in which this stud...
^^^^^^
Line 4, column 204, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...gical traits than monkeys. Secondly, we cant compare apples with oranges because tha...
^^^^
Line 4, column 245, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: that's
...ant compare apples with oranges because thats exactly what the author did in this tra...
^^^^^
Line 4, column 357, Rule ID: NUMEROUS_DIFFERENT[1]
Message: Use simply 'many'.
Suggestion: many
...e a complex species that they are, have many different emotions, triggers which causes the rel...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 595, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...different. That is the reason why there cant be a comparison between monkeys and hum...
^^^^
Line 6, column 154, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...e who have done it multiple times. This doesnt necessarily imply that first born monke...
^^^^^^
Line 6, column 352, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'a stimulus' or simply 'stimuli'?
Suggestion: a stimulus; stimuli
...h for the first time and this acting as a stimuli triggers the release of cortisol in the...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 752, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
... the hormone. This is the reason why we cant say for sure that first born monkeys ha...
^^^^
Line 8, column 71, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...this study is 'recent' but he doesnt give any additional evidence suggesting...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, if, lastly, may, second, secondly, so, then, for example, sort of, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 36.0 19.6327345309 183% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.9520958084 100% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 11.1786427146 125% => OK
Relative clauses : 28.0 13.6137724551 206% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 75.0 28.8173652695 260% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 70.0 55.5748502994 126% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 16.3942115768 67% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3243.0 2260.96107784 143% => OK
No of words: 646.0 441.139720559 146% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.02012383901 5.12650576532 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.0414809386 4.56307096286 110% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.57006645663 2.78398813304 92% => OK
Unique words: 280.0 204.123752495 137% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.433436532508 0.468620217663 92% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 1015.2 705.55239521 144% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 4.96107784431 222% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 29.0 19.7664670659 147% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 51.547491465 57.8364921388 89% => OK
Chars per sentence: 111.827586207 119.503703932 94% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.275862069 23.324526521 96% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.48275862069 5.70786347227 61% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 10.0 5.25449101796 190% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 8.20758483034 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 6.88822355289 116% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 17.0 4.67664670659 364% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.125422242175 0.218282227539 57% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0404748835137 0.0743258471296 54% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0307222826233 0.0701772020484 44% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0759798176088 0.128457276422 59% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0334250744831 0.0628817314937 53% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.4 14.3799401198 93% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 48.3550499002 102% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.197005988 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.13 12.5979740519 96% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.2 8.32208582834 99% => OK
difficult_words: 142.0 98.500998004 144% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 12.3882235529 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.