The following argument was made in a newspaper editorial:
“The autonomy of any country is based on the strength of its borders; if the number of illegal immigrants entering a country cannot be checked, both its economy and national identity are endangered. Because illegal immigrants pose such threats, every effort must be made to return them to their country of origin.”
The author argues that the autonomy of a country is fully dependent on its borders irrespective of anything else. Stated in this way, the author failed to mention several key factors on the basis of which a countrys autonomy can be evaluated. To justify the argument, the author reasons that weak border can make illegal immigrants to enter to the territory and would endanger the identity and economy of a country. However careful scrutiny of the argument provides little creditable support to authors argument. Hence, authors argument can be considered as incomplete and unsubstantiated.
First of all, the author failed to mention any information which could lead to the conclusion that strength of week border could cause endanger to the identity of a country. For instance, the powerful countries like United States and Canada has a liniency in their border that means they are agreed to cross their borders irrespective of any high checking at their borders. Thus, a country's autonomy and economy can only be maintained by the government not only the strength of the border.
Furthermore, now a days in every country, high security checks are there which won't allow illigal persons to enter in the country and if does then they have a very high charges which could cause them a great trouble. There are numerous devices and tools which could help for maintaining the security of a country, thanks to the technology. Therefore, In order to maintain the autonomy of a country, it could be secure throughout irrespective of only borders.
Finally, the information needs to be given by the author about various scenarios and examples which could trouble to a country due to illigal immigrants of other country. Although some disasters have happened previously like in Mumbai(India), terrorist have caused a great damage to the people there by blasting a bomb which has caused death to more than 100 people. But it could be noted that, in this case the bombers entered the country by plane and not from the borders. Hence, the security should be maintained throughout the country in order to preserve the autonomy and danger threat to people.
In conclusion, the author's claim is unpersuasiave as it stands. To bolster it further, the author needs to provide better concrete evidences, perhaps by the way of reliable survey about the instances where lack of security causes great damage to the country. Finally to better assess the argument, it is necessary to know that why the author only mentioned the border to be effective irrespective of full security of a country.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Sentence: For instance, the powerful countries like United States and Canada has a liniency in their border that means they are agreed to cross their borders irrespective of any high checking at their borders.
Error: liniency Suggestion: leniency
Sentence: Furthermore, now a days in every country, high security checks are there which won't allow illigal persons to enter in the country and if does then they have a very high charges which could cause them a great trouble.
Error: illigal Suggestion: illegal
Sentence: Finally, the information needs to be given by the author about various scenarios and examples which could trouble to a country due to illigal immigrants of other country.
Error: illigal Suggestion: illegal
Sentence: In conclusion, the author's claim is unpersuasiave as it stands.
Error: unpersuasiave Suggestion: No alternate word
flaws:
Need to argue against the conclusion always. For this topic it is:
Because illegal immigrants pose such threats, every effort must be made to return them to their country of origin.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 428 350
No. of Characters: 2108 1500
No. of Different Words: 195 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.548 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.925 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.639 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 166 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 126 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 78 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 39 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.778 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.121 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.722 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.356 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.572 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.094 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 14, Rule ID: NOW_A_DAYS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'nowadays'?
Suggestion: nowadays
...strength of the border. Furthermore, now a days in every country, high security checks ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 18, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'a day' or simply 'days'?
Suggestion: a day; days
...ngth of the border. Furthermore, now a days in every country, high security checks ...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 170, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'charge'?
Suggestion: charge
... and if does then they have a very high charges which could cause them a great trouble....
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 264, Rule ID: A_UNCOUNTABLE[3]
Message: Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply 'great damage'.
Suggestion: great damage
...e in MumbaiIndia, terrorist have caused a great damage to the people there by blasting a bomb ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 260, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Finally,
...ity causes great damage to the country. Finally to better assess the argument, it is ne...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, finally, first, furthermore, hence, however, if, so, then, therefore, thus, for instance, in conclusion, by the way, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 19.6327345309 71% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.9520958084 100% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 11.1786427146 98% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 13.6137724551 103% => OK
Pronoun: 20.0 28.8173652695 69% => OK
Preposition: 67.0 55.5748502994 121% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 16.3942115768 67% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2156.0 2260.96107784 95% => OK
No of words: 427.0 441.139720559 97% => OK
Chars per words: 5.04918032787 5.12650576532 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.54576487731 4.56307096286 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.72336642998 2.78398813304 98% => OK
Unique words: 200.0 204.123752495 98% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.468384074941 0.468620217663 100% => OK
syllable_count: 676.8 705.55239521 96% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 10.0 8.76447105788 114% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.22255489022 118% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 19.7664670659 91% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 22.8473053892 101% => OK
Sentence length SD: 43.6426637451 57.8364921388 75% => OK
Chars per sentence: 119.777777778 119.503703932 100% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.7222222222 23.324526521 102% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.44444444444 5.70786347227 130% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.25449101796 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 6.88822355289 131% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.197003351607 0.218282227539 90% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0743254934728 0.0743258471296 100% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0535228832317 0.0701772020484 76% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.114762835985 0.128457276422 89% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0627961794534 0.0628817314937 100% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.2 14.3799401198 99% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 48.13 48.3550499002 100% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 12.197005988 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.31 12.5979740519 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.22 8.32208582834 99% => OK
difficult_words: 93.0 98.500998004 94% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 12.3882235529 73% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 11.1389221557 101% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.