The following is a recommendation from the Board of Directors of Monarch Books.
"We recommend that Monarch Books open a café in its store. Monarch, having been in business at the same location for more than twenty years, has a large customer base because it is known for its wide selection of books on all subjects. Clearly, opening the café would attract more customers. Space could be made for the café by discontinuing the children's book section, which will probably become less popular given that the most recent national census indicated a significant decline in the percentage of the population under age ten. Opening a café will allow Monarch to attract more customers and better compete with Regal Books, which recently opened its own café."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The recommendation from the Board of Directors of Monarch Books is to open a cafe in its store to attract more customers.This recommendation is based on the facts that the store is known for its wide selection of books so opening a cafe will attract more customers and increase its sales and also since its competitor Regal books has opened a cafe in its store.To make this recommendation look convincing a few questions need to be answered.
Firstly, how can we be sure that just because the book store is known for its wide variety of books, its customers are feeling the lack of a cafe here and opening a cafe will attract more customers.These two are not related.It may be possible that the customers feel the quantity of books in its various sections are less and increasing them would attract more customers.Or may be the staff is less and increasing them would increase customer satisfaction thereby attracting more customers.If any of this scenario has merit then the argument is significantly flawed.
Secondly, we need to know what percent of the customer base does children under 10 form.Just because the overall percent of population of children under 10 is decreasing doesn't mean the number of children under 10 entering the store is less and will be reducing further.It may be possible that a high percentage of customers are the children under 10 itself and removing that section can significantly hurt the sales of the store.Therefore, this argument does not hold water.
Thirdly, there is no mention of how its competitor Regal books is doing after opening a cafe within the store.It may be possible that the sales of the books have considerably reduce after opening a cafe because the customers didn't like the taste or ambience of the place.May be by introducing a cafe there is a lot of noise in the store which is irritating the customers and thereby reducing the number of customers entering the store.This argument is not convincing enough until this question is answered.
To sum up, the recommendation from the Board of Directors is highly flawed due to its reliance on many unwarranted assumptions. The Board of Directors need to come up with more data to make their evidences look convincing.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2020-01-29 | lanhhoang | 81 | view |
| 2020-01-21 | stevewang1007 | 69 | view |
| 2020-01-20 | Anshul Agrawal | 77 | view |
| 2019-11-23 | kook | 59 | view |
| 2019-11-03 | Raunaq | 69 | view |
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 8 15
No. of Words: 390 350
No. of Characters: 1815 1500
No. of Different Words: 163 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.444 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.654 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.687 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 105 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 95 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 69 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 41 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 48.75 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 37.03 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.875 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.415 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.734 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.186 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 122, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: This
... in its store to attract more customers.This recommendation is based on the facts th...
^^^^
Line 1, column 362, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: To
...al books has opened a cafe in its store.To make this recommendation look convincin...
^^
Line 5, column 199, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: These
...ning a cafe will attract more customers.These two are not related.It may be possible ...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 225, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: It
...ore customers.These two are not related.It may be possible that the customers feel...
^^
Line 5, column 372, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Or
...asing them would attract more customers.Or may be the staff is less and increasing...
^^
Line 5, column 491, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: If
...ction thereby attracting more customers.If any of this scenario has merit then the...
^^
Line 5, column 491, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ction thereby attracting more customers.If any of this scenario has merit then the...
^^
Line 9, column 89, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Just
...stomer base does children under 10 form.Just because the overall percent of populati...
^^^^
Line 9, column 171, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...tion of children under 10 is decreasing doesnt mean the number of children under 10 en...
^^^^^^
Line 9, column 271, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: It
...re is less and will be reducing further.It may be possible that a high percentage ...
^^
Line 9, column 431, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Therefore
...gnificantly hurt the sales of the store.Therefore, this argument does not hold water. ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 111, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: It
...g after opening a cafe within the store.It may be possible that the sales of the b...
^^
Line 13, column 176, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: 'reduced'.
Suggestion: reduced
...he sales of the books have considerably reduce after opening a cafe because the custom...
^^^^^^
Line 13, column 226, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: didn't
...er opening a cafe because the customers didnt like the taste or ambience of the place...
^^^^^
Line 13, column 272, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: May
...like the taste or ambience of the place.May be by introducing a cafe there is a lot...
^^^
Line 13, column 276, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[8]
Message: The proper name in singular (May) must be used with a third-person verb: 'is'.
Suggestion: is
... the taste or ambience of the place.May be by introducing a cafe there is a lot of...
^^
Line 13, column 436, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: This
... number of customers entering the store.This argument is not convincing enough until...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, firstly, if, look, may, second, secondly, so, then, therefore, third, thirdly, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 27.0 19.6327345309 138% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 12.9520958084 116% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 11.1786427146 89% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 32.0 28.8173652695 111% => OK
Preposition: 54.0 55.5748502994 97% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 16.3942115768 91% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1863.0 2260.96107784 82% => OK
No of words: 376.0 441.139720559 85% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.95478723404 5.12650576532 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.40348946061 4.56307096286 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.94295464831 2.78398813304 106% => OK
Unique words: 163.0 204.123752495 80% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.433510638298 0.468620217663 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 586.8 705.55239521 83% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 4.96107784431 181% => OK
Article: 3.0 8.76447105788 34% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 6.0 19.7664670659 30% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 62.0 22.8473053892 271% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 186.271680319 57.8364921388 322% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 310.5 119.503703932 260% => Less chars_per_sentence wanted.
Words per sentence: 62.6666666667 23.324526521 269% => Less words per sentence wanted.
Discourse Markers: 16.8333333333 5.70786347227 295% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 17.0 5.25449101796 324% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 3.0 8.20758483034 37% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 6.88822355289 29% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.67664670659 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.265511104525 0.218282227539 122% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.146863167085 0.0743258471296 198% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0978423400817 0.0701772020484 139% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.1611981001 0.128457276422 125% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.100945817514 0.0628817314937 161% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 33.2 14.3799401198 231% => Automated_readability_index is high.
flesch_reading_ease: 8.55 48.3550499002 18% => Flesch_reading_ease is low.
smog_index: 13.0 7.1628742515 181% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 27.5 12.197005988 225% => Flesch kincaid grade is high.
coleman_liau_index: 12.32 12.5979740519 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.65 8.32208582834 116% => OK
difficult_words: 70.0 98.500998004 71% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 28.0 12.3882235529 226% => Linsear_write_formula is high.
gunning_fog: 26.8 11.1389221557 241% => Gunning_fog is high.
text_standard: 28.0 11.9071856287 235% => The average readability is very high. Good job!
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.