The following is taken from a memo from the advertising director of the Super Screen Movie Production Company.
“According to a recent report from our marketing department, during the past year, fewer people attended Super Screen-produced movies than in any other year. And yet the percentage of positive reviews by movie reviewers about specific Super Screen movies actually increased during the past year. Clearly, the contents of these reviews are not reaching enough of our prospective viewers. Thus, the problem lies not with the quality of our movies but with the public's lack of awareness that movies of good quality are available. Super Screen should therefore allocate a greater share of its budget next year to reaching the public through advertising.”
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
Although the Super Screen Movie Production Company advertising director makes a logical cause-and-effect argument, he leaves many important questions unanswered in his argument to increase advertisement spending. In order to strengthen the argument, the director would need to adress the variety of reasons that may have caused the decrease in movie showing attendence. Along with answering questions about outside variables, the director would, furthermore, need to present more information about the distribution and details of these reviews, impact of competition, and evaluation of effective advertising in order to draw any meaningful conclusions.
One of the most important factors that the author did not adress throughout the entire passage was the possibility of other confounding variables influencing the relationship between review positivity and attendance decrease. Is the decrease in people attending possibly due to an increase in cost? Has the cost of a ticket or food items gone up in the past yeat? Maybe it is not a matter of awareness of good movie quality but of lack of family or individual finances to fund move trips. In addition to cost as a factor possiblility in lowering attendance, theater changes may have also played a key role. Has Super Screen Movie Production Company done anything to change its policies or venues over the past few years. Are the movie theater seats too old? Factors such as this may have very well influenced that number of people who pay good money to sit in those seats, for example. Is there a possibility that the rise of streaming movies, such as that of Netflix, Hulu and other streaming apps, which have become household names, has lowered people's desire to attend movie theaters in the first place? Has the advertising director done research into this possible cause? These are only a few of questions that must be taken into account as other possible outside causes for the decrease in attendance. Invalidating these would greatly add value to the recommendation.
One could then question the validity of the sample size for those reviews in the first place. Did some locations get shut down? Are these customers comprehensive of the entire population's views and opinions? How are these reviews distributed and filled out? Oftentimes, surveys word questions in certain ways to elicit specific answers. Is there a possibility that these reviews primed customers to give raving reviews even if they had lackluster experiences. There is a possibility that the decrease in attendance may actually be due to dissastisfaction in customers even if the reviews went up due to this discrepency.
Outside competitors may have also influenced this decrease in viewer attendance. Throghout the argument, the author makes no reference to any competition. Do Super Screen Movie Production Company theaters have any competition close by? Maybe it is not a matter of customers being aware of the quality movies, but being aware that there are better theaters availible. Without mention of any competition, the author leaves it up to the interpretation of the reader to asses whether or not other movie franchises may have influenced this fall in customers.
Furthermore, with the rise of popular media, awareness of good quality movies is often brought to the viewers through the variety of advertisements and social media campaigns. The author makes the assumption that the only way for people to be aware of good quality movies is through their local theaters. In order to asses whether it is truly the production company's own lack of advertising, the director would need to present evidence that the customers are unaware of the theaters showing these movies, not the movies themselves.
To strengthen this argument in order to draw any conclusion to raise funds for advertising, the director must adress the outside confounding variables that may have influenced the decrease in attendance, other inside factors such as old seats that may have lowered viewers tendencies to pick the theater, the validity of the survey, impact of competition, and affects of effective advertising on the decline. This would not only strengthen the argument, but make the recommendation useful for Super Screen Movie Production Company to possibly allocate funds to advertising in order to raise customer viewership back up.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Sentence: In order to strengthen the argument, the director would need to adress the variety of reasons that may have caused the decrease in movie showing attendence.
Error: adress Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: attendence Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: One of the most important factors that the author did not adress throughout the entire passage was the possibility of other confounding variables influencing the relationship between review positivity and attendance decrease.
Error: adress Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: Has the cost of a ticket or food items gone up in the past yeat?
Error: yeat Suggestion: year
Sentence: In addition to cost as a factor possiblility in lowering attendance, theater changes may have also played a key role.
Error: possiblility Suggestion: possibility
Sentence: There is a possibility that the decrease in attendance may actually be due to dissastisfaction in customers even if the reviews went up due to this discrepency.
Error: discrepency Suggestion: discrepancy
Error: dissastisfaction Suggestion: dissatisfaction
Sentence: Maybe it is not a matter of customers being aware of the quality movies, but being aware that there are better theaters availible.
Error: availible Suggestion: available
Sentence: To strengthen this argument in order to draw any conclusion to raise funds for advertising, the director must adress the outside confounding variables that may have influenced the decrease in attendance, other inside factors such as old seats that may have lowered viewers tendencies to pick the theater, the validity of the survey, impact of competition, and affects of effective advertising on the decline.
Error: adress Suggestion: No alternate word
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flaws:
the arguments are not on the right track. need to argue accordingly:
condition 1:
According to a recent report from our marketing department, during the past year, fewer people attended Super Screen-produced movies than in any other year. And yet the percentage of positive reviews by movie reviewers about specific Super Screen movies actually increased during the past year.
we may argue like:
here is is about about specific Super Screen movies which actually increased, but other movies may got negative reviews or normal reviews.
condition 2:
Clearly, the contents of these reviews are not reaching enough of our prospective viewers. Thus, the problem lies not with the quality of our movies but with the public's lack of awareness that movies of good quality are available.
we may argue like:
people may watch those movies by DVD, Internet, phone...
conclusion:
Super Screen should therefore allocate a greater share of its budget next year to reaching the public through advertising
we may argue like:
maybe the advertising fees are pretty enough.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 2.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 9 2
No. of Sentences: 32 15
No. of Words: 695 350
No. of Characters: 3602 1500
No. of Different Words: 294 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 5.134 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.183 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.873 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 262 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 209 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 151 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 103 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.719 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 12.034 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.469 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.258 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.456 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.069 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 8, column 473, Rule ID: WHETHER[7]
Message: Perhaps you can shorten this phrase to just 'whether'. It is correct though if you mean 'regardless of whether'.
Suggestion: whether
...e interpretation of the reader to asses whether or not other movie franchises may have influen...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, first, furthermore, if, may, so, then, well, for example, in addition, such as, in the first place
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 19.6327345309 107% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 19.0 12.9520958084 147% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 11.1786427146 143% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 13.6137724551 110% => OK
Pronoun: 39.0 28.8173652695 135% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 108.0 55.5748502994 194% => OK
Nominalization: 37.0 16.3942115768 226% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3682.0 2260.96107784 163% => OK
No of words: 695.0 441.139720559 158% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.29784172662 5.12650576532 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.13447686263 4.56307096286 113% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.950140684 2.78398813304 106% => OK
Unique words: 300.0 204.123752495 147% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.431654676259 0.468620217663 92% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 1166.4 705.55239521 165% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.67365269461 239% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 8.0 4.22255489022 189% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 32.0 19.7664670659 162% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 22.8473053892 92% => OK
Sentence length SD: 79.425469929 57.8364921388 137% => OK
Chars per sentence: 115.0625 119.503703932 96% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.71875 23.324526521 93% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.71875 5.70786347227 65% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 8.20758483034 207% => Less positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 11.0 4.67664670659 235% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.154906203181 0.218282227539 71% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0451867741803 0.0743258471296 61% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0558554100414 0.0701772020484 80% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0915243281724 0.128457276422 71% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0425293663946 0.0628817314937 68% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.4 14.3799401198 100% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 41.7 48.3550499002 86% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 12.197005988 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.46 12.5979740519 107% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.06 8.32208582834 97% => OK
difficult_words: 149.0 98.500998004 151% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 15.0 12.3882235529 121% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.1389221557 93% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 11.9071856287 126% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.