An international development organization, in response to a vitamin A deficiency among people in the impoverished nation of Tagus, has engineered a new breed of millet high in vitamin A. While seeds for this new type of millet cost more, farmers will be paid subsidies for farming the new variety of millet. Since millet is already a staple food in Tagus, people will readily adopt the new variety. To combat vitamin A deficiency, the government of Tagus should do everything it can to promote this new type of millet.
Argument start by stating that international development organization as made a plan to curb vitamin A deficiency by developing and encouraging consumption of genetically modified millet. According to author it seems best plan because it is staple food . Consume this millet be free from Vit-A deficiency. This entire health benefit plan is built upon assumptions without considering or may say mentioning the important factors like people in tagus
adaptibility to new millet to the effect on cultivation after replacing old once with the new modified millet
Firstly, assuming that Vit-A deficiency can only be cause by not consuming vit-A rich food is big short come of this plan. Vit-A can be cause by many underline disease like deficiency of intrinsic factors, heart disease , autoimmune diseases . Even it people with such disease consume Vit-A rich food they remain still deficient.
secondly, why target or engineer only millet ignoring other rich vit-A food source is the big question here,. There is no such data/information stating that. which again shows the big assumption that people love millet to very extent ignoring people from all ages have the compliance towards millets consumption. Promoting all vit-A rich food would be best idea then just one which may overcome above mention problem and would have saved money invested in this project
Thirdly, The is also lack of data mentioning about the adaptability of new seeds by the land. No details given where they have same cultivation yield as before , does they take same duration for growing as formal onces and if not that is why they cost more money, or just company who made them need to balance the investment and profits. This question raised and answer to them would have give more support to the plan.
In sum, i would say after considering or given data about above raised questions this plan would have be stand strong rather then its current state with full of spectics .
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2023-08-20 | Dinesh4518 | 63 | view |
| 2023-08-11 | Nowshin Tabassum | 69 | view |
| 2023-07-21 | Gnyana | 68 | view |
| 2023-07-20 | Prasad002 | 59 | view |
| 2023-07-08 | tanvik21 | 74 | view |
- Claim Even though young people often receive the advice to follow your dreams more emphasis should be placed on picking worthy goals Reason Many people s dreams are inherently selfish 83
- An international development organization in response to a vitamin A deficiency among people in the impoverished nation of Tagus has engineered a new breed of millet high in vitamin A While seeds for this new type of millet cost more farmers will be paid 55
- Company management should conduct routine monitoring of all employee e mail correspondence Such monitoring will reduce the waste of resources such as time and system capacity as well as protect the company from lawsuits 50
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 11 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 9 2
No. of Sentences: 11 15
No. of Words: 322 350
No. of Characters: 1601 1500
No. of Different Words: 184 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.236 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.972 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.504 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 103 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 77 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 50 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 35 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 29.273 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 16.304 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.545 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.39 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.485 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.149 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 2 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 253, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...eems best plan because it is staple food . Consume this millet be free from Vit-A ...
^^
Line 4, column 50, Rule ID: BE_CAUSE[1]
Message: Did you mean 'because'?
Suggestion: because
...assuming that Vit-A deficiency can only be cause by not consuming vit-A rich food is big...
^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 134, Rule ID: BE_CAUSE[1]
Message: Did you mean 'because'?
Suggestion: because
... big short come of this plan. Vit-A can be cause by many underline disease like deficien...
^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 220, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...ency of intrinsic factors, heart disease , autoimmune diseases . Even it people wi...
^^
Line 4, column 242, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...ors, heart disease , autoimmune diseases . Even it people with such disease consum...
^^
Line 4, column 253, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'peoples'?
Suggestion: peoples
...disease , autoimmune diseases . Even it people with such disease consume Vit-A rich fo...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Secondly
...rich food they remain still deficient. secondly, why target or engineer only millet ign...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 108, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , .
...t-A food source is the big question here,. There is no such data/information stati...
^^
Line 5, column 158, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Which
... no such data/information stating that. which again shows the big assumption that peo...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 158, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “which” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
... no such data/information stating that. which again shows the big assumption that peo...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 349, Rule ID: THE_SUPERLATIVE[4]
Message: A determiner is probably missing here: 'be the best'.
Suggestion: be the best
...on. Promoting all vit-A rich food would be best idea then just one which may overcome a...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 437, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ove mention problem and would have saved money invested in this project Thirdly,...
^^
Line 6, column 160, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...ey have same cultivation yield as before , does they take same duration for growin...
^^
Line 6, column 163, Rule ID: DOES_YOU[2]
Message: Did you mean 'do'? 'does' is only used for the third person singular (he/she/it).
Suggestion: do
...have same cultivation yield as before , does they take same duration for growing as ...
^^^^
Line 7, column 9, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...give more support to the plan. In sum, i would say after considering or given da...
^
Line 7, column 103, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Use past participle here: 'been'.
Suggestion: been
...e raised questions this plan would have be stand strong rather then its current st...
^^
Line 7, column 126, Rule ID: RATHER_THEN[1]
Message: Did you mean 'than'? 'than' is used for comparisons, 'then' is an expression of time.
Suggestion: than
... plan would have be stand strong rather then its current state with full of spectics...
^^^^
Line 7, column 170, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
... its current state with full of spectics .
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, firstly, if, may, second, secondly, so, still, then, third, thirdly, as for
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 19.6327345309 61% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 12.9520958084 77% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 13.6137724551 66% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 22.0 28.8173652695 76% => OK
Preposition: 41.0 55.5748502994 74% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 16.3942115768 98% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1638.0 2260.96107784 72% => OK
No of words: 321.0 441.139720559 73% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.10280373832 5.12650576532 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.23278547379 4.56307096286 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.62122622136 2.78398813304 94% => OK
Unique words: 186.0 204.123752495 91% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.579439252336 0.468620217663 124% => OK
syllable_count: 511.2 705.55239521 72% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 1.0 8.76447105788 11% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.70958083832 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 19.7664670659 66% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 24.0 22.8473053892 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 92.9620397173 57.8364921388 161% => OK
Chars per sentence: 126.0 119.503703932 105% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.6923076923 23.324526521 106% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.76923076923 5.70786347227 119% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 18.0 5.25449101796 343% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 8.20758483034 146% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 6.88822355289 15% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.67664670659 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.217786419173 0.218282227539 100% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0750208982208 0.0743258471296 101% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0649077795536 0.0701772020484 92% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.114213469484 0.128457276422 89% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0649638916187 0.0628817314937 103% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.9 14.3799401198 104% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 48.3550499002 97% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 12.197005988 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.6 12.5979740519 100% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.61 8.32208582834 103% => OK
difficult_words: 77.0 98.500998004 78% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 15.5 12.3882235529 125% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.1389221557 104% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.