“The Smith Corporation should not be permitted to develop the land that is now part of the Youngtown Wildlife Preserve. This sanctuary is essential to the survival of the 300 bird species that live in our area. Although only a small percentage of the la

Essay topics:

“The Smith Corporation should not be permitted to develop the land that is now part of the Youngtown Wildlife Preserve. This sanctuary is essential to the survival of the 300 bird species that live in our area. Although only a small percentage of the land will be sold to Smith, the proposed development will have disastrous consequences for our area. The company plans to build a small hotel on the land. Although they have promised to ensure the preservation of the sanctuary, there is no way that their plans will do anything but harm the sanctuary. There are no circumstances under which this sale will benefit our community, which relies on tourists who visit.”

The petition says that Smith Corporation should not be permitted to develope the land that is now a part of the Yougtown Wildlife Preserve. It states that the sale of this land will not benefit but only harm the community. There are many assumptions that have not been answered in the petition and answers to which can have implications on the final decision or the result of this sale.

The petition says that the sanctuary is essential to the suvival of the 300 bird species living in the area. We assume that the birds cover whole of the area of the sanctaury , which may not be the case. If the birds live only in certain area. The rest areas can be developed by the corporation . Also ,there is an assumption that the sanctuary is the only place that is essential to the survival of the 300 birds. If there are other places nearby, if a part of the sanctuary is developed some of the birds may relocate to the nearby areas.

Another assumption is related to the relationship between percentage and number. The petition says that inly a small percentage of land will be taken up for developement .How much is a small percentage also matters. For some 1% could be called a small percentage and for some 50% could be a small percentage. For the Corporation this percentage is "more the merrier". Also how much and where is the area being developed. If it is a 4 acre sanctuary a small percentage will constitute a small land and it would more likely to be inhabitated by the birds , the preserve aims to save. If it is a 100acre sanctuary a small percentage will be a bigger area of land by the likelihood of being birds inhabitating reduces as the population density here decreases. Also irrespective of the amount of land, if the area to be developed is the part that is the home to most of the birds , the land should not got for developement.

It says that the hotel will have disasterous consequences for the sanctuary. This need not be true of made at sufficient distance from bird population. The petition says that the sale will not benefit the community at any cost because the community relies on the tourist who visit the sanctuary to see the magnificient bird population,This assumes that the community has no other means of livelihood and that the developement will decrease the glamour of magnificient bird population. If the area is developed it may engender a number of other jobs like-construction, jobs, schools etc. Thus, it may benefit the community. Also the developement is done properly and with planning it may result in no disturbance to the bird population.

Thus , we have to keep many assumptions and factors in mind before jumping to a conclusion. The developement may or may not disturb the bird population and the community survival depending how thorughly thought or planned the sale is made.

Votes
Average: 7.7 (3 votes)
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Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 174, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...cover whole of the area of the sanctaury , which may not be the case. If the birds...
^^
Line 2, column 204, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
... sanctaury , which may not be the case. If the birds live only in certain area. Th...
^^
Line 2, column 294, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...reas can be developed by the corporation . Also ,there is an assumption that the s...
^^
Line 2, column 301, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...n be developed by the corporation . Also ,there is an assumption that the sanctuar...
^^
Line 2, column 489, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
...if a part of the sanctuary is developed some of the birds may relocate to the nearby areas....
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 169, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...f land will be taken up for developement .How much is a small percentage also matt...
^^
Line 3, column 171, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: How
...land will be taken up for developement .How much is a small percentage also matters...
^^^
Line 3, column 378, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...entage is 'more the merrier'. Also how much and where is the area being de...
^^^^
Line 3, column 562, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...re likely to be inhabitated by the birds , the preserve aims to save. If it is a 1...
^^
Line 3, column 766, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
... the population density here decreases. Also irrespective of the amount of land, if ...
^^^^
Line 3, column 884, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...rt that is the home to most of the birds , the land should not got for developemen...
^^
Line 3, column 907, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'should' requires the base form of the verb: 'get'
Suggestion: get
...most of the birds , the land should not got for developement. It says that the ho...
^^^
Line 5, column 183, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , This
... to see the magnificient bird population,This assumes that the community has no other...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 471, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...tc. Thus, it may benefit the community. Also the developement is done properly and w...
^^^^
Line 6, column 5, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...isturbance to the bird population. Thus , we have to keep many assumptions and fa...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, if, may, so, thus

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 32.0 19.6327345309 163% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 22.0 12.9520958084 170% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 11.1786427146 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 18.0 13.6137724551 132% => OK
Pronoun: 29.0 28.8173652695 101% => OK
Preposition: 51.0 55.5748502994 92% => OK
Nominalization: 24.0 16.3942115768 146% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2342.0 2260.96107784 104% => OK
No of words: 496.0 441.139720559 112% => OK
Chars per words: 4.72177419355 5.12650576532 92% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.71922212354 4.56307096286 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.91299705636 2.78398813304 105% => OK
Unique words: 199.0 204.123752495 97% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.401209677419 0.468620217663 86% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 752.4 705.55239521 107% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 2.70958083832 258% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 0.0 4.22255489022 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 19.7664670659 126% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 22.8473053892 83% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 59.5030889954 57.8364921388 103% => OK
Chars per sentence: 93.68 119.503703932 78% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.84 23.324526521 85% => OK
Discourse Markers: 1.12 5.70786347227 20% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 15.0 5.25449101796 285% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 14.0 4.67664670659 299% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.413210431474 0.218282227539 189% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.125210186763 0.0743258471296 168% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.094171988859 0.0701772020484 134% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.186272021852 0.128457276422 145% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.121470278982 0.0628817314937 193% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.7 14.3799401198 74% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 48.3550499002 125% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 12.197005988 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.1 12.5979740519 80% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.35 8.32208582834 88% => OK
difficult_words: 87.0 98.500998004 88% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 12.3882235529 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.1389221557 86% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------

Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Sentence: The petition says that Smith Corporation should not be permitted to develope the land that is now a part of the Yougtown Wildlife Preserve.
Error: develope Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: The petition says that the sanctuary is essential to the suvival of the 300 bird species living in the area.
Error: suvival Suggestion: survival

Sentence: We assume that the birds cover whole of the area of the sanctaury , which may not be the case.
Error: may Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: sanctaury Suggestion: sanctuary

Sentence: The petition says that inly a small percentage of land will be taken up for developement .How much is a small percentage also matters.
Error: developement Suggestion: development
Error: inly Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: For the Corporation this percentage is 'more the merrier'.
Error: merrier Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: If it is a 4 acre sanctuary a small percentage will constitute a small land and it would more likely to be inhabitated by the birds , the preserve aims to save.
Error: inhabitated Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: If it is a 100acre sanctuary a small percentage will be a bigger area of land by the likelihood of being birds inhabitating reduces as the population density here decreases.
Error: inhabitating Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: Also irrespective of the amount of land, if the area to be developed is the part that is the home to most of the birds , the land should not got for developement.
Error: developement Suggestion: development

Sentence: It says that the hotel will have disasterous consequences for the sanctuary.
Error: disasterous Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: The petition says that the sale will not benefit the community at any cost because the community relies on the tourist who visit the sanctuary to see the magnificient bird population,This assumes that the community has no other means of livelihood and that the developement will decrease the glamour of magnificient bird population.
Error: developement Suggestion: development
Error: magnificient Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: Also the developement is done properly and with planning it may result in no disturbance to the bird population.
Error: may Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: developement Suggestion: development

Sentence: The developement may or may not disturb the bird population and the community survival depending how thorughly thought or planned the sale is made.
Error: may Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: developement Suggestion: development
Error: thorughly Suggestion: thoroughly

----------------------
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 14 2
No. of Sentences: 24 15
No. of Words: 497 350
No. of Characters: 2282 1500
No. of Different Words: 187 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.722 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.592 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.778 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 130 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 112 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 87 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 67 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.708 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.969 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.583 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.309 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.521 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.116 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5