A ten-year nationwide study of the effectiveness of wearing a helmet while bicycling indicates that ten years ago, approximately 35 percent of all bicyclists reported wearing helmets, whereas today that number is nearly 80 percent. Another study, however, suggests that during the same ten-year period, the number of accidents caused by bicycling has increased 200 percent. These results demonstrate that bicyclists feel safer because they are wearing helmets, and they take more risks as a result. Thus, there is clearly a call for the government to strive to reduce the number of serious injuries from bicycle accidents by launching an education program that concentrates on the factors other than helmet use that are necessary for bicycle safety
The speaker unreasonably concludes that launching an education program which concentrates on the factors other than helmet and bicycle safety.The evidence is insubstantial,unrepresentative and mostly irrelevant to the issues involved.Therefore,unless a number of questions are answered satisfactorily,this cannot be considered as a cogent argument.
Firstly the speaker mentions about the effectiveness of wearing a helmet while bicycling.There is no sufficient data statistically about the ten years which would help us get an idea about what percent of people wearing helmet while riding a bicycle.He mentions the percentage of bicyclists wearing helmets based on what terms did the percentage was taken what if it was asked by people who are not regular users of bicycles.There was no clear information on the accidents caused by bicycling which increased to such huge percent.Was it because of bicycles or the people who are bicylcing were met with accidents on what basis the number of accidents happened were calculated into this percentage.
Secondly the results which demonstrates that bicyclists feel safer as they were wearing helmets was not mentioned by the speaker and the term which means take more risks what does this really mean.There might be a chance that there is no speed limit for bicycles so that is why people who are running late to work or college tend to use bicycles and to reach on time they increase their speed which can lead to accidents.So result which was demonstrated should have been mentioned with a clear statistical data to understand the argument more appropriately.The possiblity of accidents might be triple riding and many other factors which the speaker failed to mention.
Thirdly the speaker mentions that government should strive to reduce the number of serious injuries from bicycle accidents but he forgot to the mention that whether it is caused to the bicyclists if so why did this happen was it due to overspeeding or what if the roads were not good enough to ride which lead to accidents.Launcing an education program wasn't a great initiative instead they can pass on a rule that if people do not wear helmets then they would be fined and also there was no requisite information on what he refers to factors other than helmet what kind of factors should the people be aware about other than helmet for bicycle safety.
In the conclusion this argument would have been more eloquent if the speaker had given more information related to the bicycle safety and the accidents occurred with a proper analysis of data.In the absence of the essential information this argument can't be deemed to be persuasive.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2021-07-29 | Anirudha Balaji Shirsikar | 50 | view |
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 8 15
No. of Words: 446 350
No. of Characters: 2203 1500
No. of Different Words: 201 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.596 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.939 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.716 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 159 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 116 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 76 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 54 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 55.75 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 26.214 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.75 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.464 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.796 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.19 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 143, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: The
...rs other than helmet and bicycle safety.The evidence is insubstantial,unrepresentat...
^^^
Line 1, column 172, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , unrepresentative
...cle safety.The evidence is insubstantial,unrepresentative and mostly irrelevant to the issues inv...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 235, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Therefore
...ostly irrelevant to the issues involved.Therefore,unless a number of questions are answer...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 244, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , unless
...elevant to the issues involved.Therefore,unless a number of questions are answered sati...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 301, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , this
...of questions are answered satisfactorily,this cannot be considered as a cogent argume...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 90, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: There
...ess of wearing a helmet while bicycling.There is no sufficient data statistically abo...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 251, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: He
...e wearing helmet while riding a bicycle.He mentions the percentage of bicyclists w...
^^
Line 5, column 347, Rule ID: DID_PAST[1]
Message: Did you mean 'be'?
Suggestion: be
... based on what terms did the percentage was taken what if it was asked by people wh...
^^^
Line 5, column 426, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: There
...e who are not regular users of bicycles.There was no clear information on the acciden...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 531, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Was
...ng which increased to such huge percent.Was it because of bicycles or the people wh...
^^^
Line 5, column 572, Rule ID: WHO_NOUN[1]
Message: A noun should not follow "who". Try changing to a verb or maybe to 'who is a are'.
Suggestion: who is a are
...as it because of bicycles or the people who are bicylcing were met with accidents on wh...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 198, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: There
...e more risks what does this really mean.There might be a chance that there is no spee...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 422, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: So
...their speed which can lead to accidents.So result which was demonstrated should ha...
^^
Line 9, column 558, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: The
...erstand the argument more appropriately.The possiblity of accidents might be triple...
^^^
Line 13, column 324, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Launcing
... enough to ride which lead to accidents.Launcing an education program wasnt a great init...
^^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 354, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: wasn't
...accidents.Launcing an education program wasnt a great initiative instead they can pas...
^^^^^
Line 17, column 193, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: In
...occurred with a proper analysis of data.In the absence of the essential informatio...
^^
Line 17, column 251, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...the essential information this argument cant be deemed to be persuasive.
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, if, really, second, secondly, so, then, therefore, third, thirdly, while, kind of
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 30.0 19.6327345309 153% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.9520958084 85% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 11.1786427146 98% => OK
Relative clauses : 19.0 13.6137724551 140% => OK
Pronoun: 26.0 28.8173652695 90% => OK
Preposition: 50.0 55.5748502994 90% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 16.3942115768 91% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2244.0 2260.96107784 99% => OK
No of words: 431.0 441.139720559 98% => OK
Chars per words: 5.20649651972 5.12650576532 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.55637350225 4.56307096286 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.30478006323 2.78398813304 119% => OK
Unique words: 204.0 204.123752495 100% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.473317865429 0.468620217663 101% => OK
syllable_count: 698.4 705.55239521 99% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 3.0 8.76447105788 34% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 5.0 19.7664670659 25% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 86.0 22.8473053892 376% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 176.729624002 57.8364921388 306% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 448.8 119.503703932 376% => Less chars_per_sentence wanted.
Words per sentence: 86.2 23.324526521 370% => Less words per sentence wanted.
Discourse Markers: 21.6 5.70786347227 378% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 18.0 5.25449101796 343% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 0.0 8.20758483034 0% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.67664670659 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.134648203491 0.218282227539 62% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0750398652241 0.0743258471296 101% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0652394226457 0.0701772020484 93% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0750398652241 0.128457276422 58% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0652394226457 0.0628817314937 104% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 46.2 14.3799401198 321% => Automated_readability_index is high.
flesch_reading_ease: -15.81 48.3550499002 -33% => Flesch_reading_ease is low.
smog_index: 15.9 7.1628742515 222% => Smog_index is high.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 36.8 12.197005988 302% => Flesch kincaid grade is high.
coleman_liau_index: 14.12 12.5979740519 112% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 11.24 8.32208582834 135% => OK
difficult_words: 91.0 98.500998004 92% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 31.0 12.3882235529 250% => Linsear_write_formula is high.
gunning_fog: 36.4 11.1389221557 327% => Gunning_fog is high.
text_standard: 37.0 11.9071856287 311% => The average readability is very high. Good job!
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.