There is now evidence that the relaxed pace of life in small towns promotes better health and greater longevity than does the hectic pace of life in big cities. Businesses in the small town of Leeville report fewer days of sick leave taken by individual workers than do businesses in the nearby large city of Masonton. Furthermore, Leeville has only one physician for its one thousand residents, but in Masonton the proportion of physicians to residents is five times as high. Finally, the average age of Leeville residents is significantly higher than that of Masonton residents. These findings suggest that the relaxed pace of life in Leeville allows residents to live longer, healthier lives.
Write a response in which you discuss one or more alternative explanations that could rival the proposed explanation and explain how your explanation(s) can plausibly account for the facts presented in the argument.
The author of this memo makes a few bold assumptions while stating his opinion. There are many questions which come to mind which are left unanswered, making this argument weak. There could be a number of other possible reasons as to why the citizens of Leeville have better health and greater longevity than the citizens of Masonton.
The author, while making his assumptions fails to produce any evidence whatsoever, which could justify his argument. A recent study showing the health and longevity of life of the citizens of both cities, with varying ages, would be required to back this argument. The author fails to recognize other possibilities of the health of the citizens in Leeville being better than those in Masonton. One such explanation could be, since Masonton is a very hectic and busy city, it may have a low air quality index, due to large number of vehicles on the roads. Whereas, for Leeville, which is a smaller town may have lesser number of vehicles, cause less pollution and in turn having citizens with better health.
The author also makes an assumption about the number of physicians in both the cities. Does the number of physicians in a city affect the health and longevity of a citizen’s life? Leeville, which is a smaller city in comparison to Masonton, might not have more than one physician, but that certainly does not mean, that the health of the citizens is better because of the presence only one physician. The health and longevity of life of a population in a city is certainly not proportional to the number of physicians in that city.
The author states that the average age of the citizens in Leeville is higher than that of Masonton. This could be because many old people settle down in small, peaceful towns or cities contrary to the younger generations who are more drawn to the opportunities big cities provide. This could be another reason for the difference of superficial longevity of life in the two cities of Leeville and Masonton.
In conclusion, the milieu of a citizen is not the only factor contributing to him. There could be several factors such as their daily habits, genetic disorders, etc. Hence the author should rethink the argument, and strengthen it by adding more evidence to the health and longevity of life of the two cities of Leeville and Masonton.
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2023-08-12 | okazaki11 | 73 | view |
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 397 350
No. of Characters: 1880 1500
No. of Different Words: 171 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.464 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.736 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.531 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 139 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 92 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 69 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 35 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.353 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.007 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.529 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.379 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.589 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.09 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, hence, if, may, so, then, whereas, while, as to, in conclusion, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.6327345309 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.9520958084 85% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 11.1786427146 107% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 18.0 28.8173652695 62% => OK
Preposition: 59.0 55.5748502994 106% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 16.3942115768 73% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1937.0 2260.96107784 86% => OK
No of words: 397.0 441.139720559 90% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.87909319899 5.12650576532 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.46372701284 4.56307096286 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.62857179704 2.78398813304 94% => OK
Unique words: 180.0 204.123752495 88% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.453400503778 0.468620217663 97% => OK
syllable_count: 613.8 705.55239521 87% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 19.7664670659 91% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 38.6609191131 57.8364921388 67% => OK
Chars per sentence: 107.611111111 119.503703932 90% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.0555555556 23.324526521 95% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.55555555556 5.70786347227 80% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.25449101796 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.205553837893 0.218282227539 94% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0751860671359 0.0743258471296 101% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0630846810124 0.0701772020484 90% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.125766132902 0.128457276422 98% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0350194136667 0.0628817314937 56% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.6 14.3799401198 88% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 48.3550499002 119% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.197005988 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.02 12.5979740519 87% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.75 8.32208582834 93% => OK
difficult_words: 76.0 98.500998004 77% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 12.3882235529 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.