Woven baskets characterized by a particular distinctive pattern have previously been found only in the immediate vicinity of the prehistoric village of Palea and therefore were believed to have been made only by the Palean people. Recently, however, archaeologists discovered such a "Palean" basket in Lithos, an ancient village across the Brim River from Palea. The Brim River is very deep and broad, and so the ancient Paleans could have crossed it only by boat, and no Palean boats have been found. Thus it follows that the so-called Palean baskets were not uniquely Palean.
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The above argument states that woven baskets that were once thought to be unique to the Palean people are not longer unique to them because it was identified in a village across the Brim River that requires a boat to get across, and no boats have been discovered. However, this conclusion is weak because it does not address several factors that could explain the discrepancy that exists in the argument.
The argument states that the "Brim River is very deep and broad...so the ancient Paleans could have corss it only by boat..." This statement relys on the assumption that the river existed in ancient Palean. It is very possible that the river did not exist back. Even if there was a source of water back then, the river might not have been as deep and broad as it is in present day. So, boats would not have been necessary for crossing the river, thus there is a lack of boat discovery. If the author had addressed the condition of the Brim River in the days of ancient Palean, then the argument would be stronger.
The next assumption that the author makes is that the Lithos ancient village was completely unrelated to the Palean village. This idea is upheld under the assumption that the Brim River exists and other ancient villages resided on both sides. However, since we do not know if the Brim River was indeed as deep and as broad as it is now, it weakens the argument. It is possible that the river did not exist and the Palean people were able to move about the land unhindered, thus they were able to occupy the majority of the land. Then, as time passed, the river slowly deepened and broadened, separating the the ancient village into two. Thus, as time passes, the villages eventually evolve, but still share similar cultures, leading to the discovery of a "Palean" basket. Again, if the author were to provide evidence on the existence of the Brim River in ancient Palea, it would strengthen the argument. It would also help to strengthen the argument if the author were to provide the history of ancient Lithos to show that they were a unique village, not a subset of Palea.
Lastly, the author assumes that the Lithos and Palea people were not in contact with each other because of the Brim River. If the river did not exist, it is possible that there was communication between the two ancient villages. Since they were only divided by a river's distance, they could have traded ideas and culture. The two villages might have even had a trade and barter system, which would explain why there was only one "Palean" basket discovered, instead of many. Thus, if the author were to address the amount of baskets discovered, it could strengthen his argument.
The best way for the author to strengthen his argument would be to provide evidence on the condition on the Brim River, because his main argument rely solely on the idea that the Brim River was far too deep and broad for anybody to travel without a boat.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Sentence: The argument states that the 'Brim River is very deep and broad...so the ancient Paleans could have corss it only by boat...'
Error: corss Suggestion: cross
Sentence: This statement relys on the assumption that the river existed in ancient Palean.
Error: relys Suggestion: rely
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argument 1 -- OK
argument 2 -- somehow duplicated to argument 1. need to argue this:
and so the ancient Paleans could have crossed it only by boat, and no Palean boats have been found.
we may argue like:
maybe people from Lithos have boats.
argument 3 -- still somehow duplicated to argument 1.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 2 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 522 350
No. of Characters: 2347 1500
No. of Different Words: 193 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.78 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.496 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.183 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 151 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 103 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 54 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 28 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.727 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.176 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.636 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.369 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.531 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.132 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 471, Rule ID: A_LOT_OF_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun boat seems to be countable; consider using: 'a lack of boats'.
Suggestion: a lack of boats
...y for crossing the river, thus there is a lack of boat discovery. If the author had addressed ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 603, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: the
...owly deepened and broadened, separating the the ancient village into two. Thus, as time...
^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 603, Rule ID: DT_DT[1]
Message: Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only 'the' or 'the' is left.
Suggestion: the; the
...owly deepened and broadened, separating the the ancient village into two. Thus, as time...
^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 753, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...r cultures, leading to the discovery of a 'Palean' basket. Again, if th...
^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, however, if, lastly, so, still, then, thus
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 33.0 19.6327345309 168% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.9520958084 93% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 11.1786427146 107% => OK
Relative clauses : 17.0 13.6137724551 125% => OK
Pronoun: 40.0 28.8173652695 139% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 54.0 55.5748502994 97% => OK
Nominalization: 21.0 16.3942115768 128% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2450.0 2260.96107784 108% => OK
No of words: 521.0 441.139720559 118% => OK
Chars per words: 4.70249520154 5.12650576532 92% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.77759609229 4.56307096286 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.46128581718 2.78398813304 88% => OK
Unique words: 208.0 204.123752495 102% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.399232245681 0.468620217663 85% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 774.0 705.55239521 110% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 4.96107784431 222% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 10.0 2.70958083832 369% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 19.7664670659 106% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 22.8473053892 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 50.186906894 57.8364921388 87% => OK
Chars per sentence: 116.666666667 119.503703932 98% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.8095238095 23.324526521 106% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.52380952381 5.70786347227 44% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 8.20758483034 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.88822355289 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.67664670659 214% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.157115103433 0.218282227539 72% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0587109777575 0.0743258471296 79% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0444092680473 0.0701772020484 63% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.103161426467 0.128457276422 80% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0553481337164 0.0628817314937 88% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.1 14.3799401198 91% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 55.58 48.3550499002 115% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 12.197005988 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.28 12.5979740519 82% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.68 8.32208582834 92% => OK
difficult_words: 94.0 98.500998004 95% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 18.0 12.3882235529 145% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.1389221557 104% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.