College students should be encouraged to pursue subjects that interest them rather than seek programs that promise entry into the job market.

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College students should be encouraged to pursue subjects that interest them rather than seek programs that promise entry into the job market.

The discussion of the issue among individuals and in society as a whole has come into vogue during the last decade. In my point of view, I agree with the speaker for some obvious reasons. There are many instances supporting my view.

First, it goes without saying that being happy is the main aim of all people around world. In order to see this point clearly, let us see an example. From the genesis of the life every creature search for the real happiness and well-being. I wanted to be a soldier because I thought there is something inherent to me related to life of a soldier. I love my country and I thought I should be one of these people protecting this blissful country. For this reason, I decided to be a soldier and now I am happy to have chosen this profession. Someone looking for the real happiness should follow the inner senses directing him to what interest him.

Although I agree that one should follow his interest, it is obviously true that one can find a job more easily by taking courses leading to a well-paid job. However, it doesn`t mean one cannot find a job by following his own interest. There are lots of artists who have chosen to live their own life without being forced to choose a course guaranteeing him a good job. Take into consideration Picasso. He is one of the most famous artists and he decided to be a painter not considering how he would support his life. However, he led a happy and wealthy life. So taking courses interesting you doesn`t mean you will live in penury.

On the other hand, there wouldn`t be any artist if everyone took courses considering their future life. There would be a community in which everyone is doing a well-paid job but no singers, painters, architectures. Life would be boring and banal resulting in a moody life. I think no one wants to live in such a dull world.

From what has been discussed above, we may safely draw the conclusion that one should pursue subjects that interest him.

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2012-06-18 deltoid5312 77 view
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Sentence: Someone looking for the real happiness should follow the inner senses directing him to what interest him.
Description: The word interest is not usually used as a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to interest

Sentence: From what has been discussed above, we may safely draw the conclusion that one should pursue subjects that interest him.
Description: The word interest is not usually used as a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to interest

Sentence: So taking courses interesting you doesnt mean you will live in penury.
Error: doesnt Suggestion: does not

Sentence: On the other hand, there wouldnt be any artist if everyone took courses considering their future life.
Error: wouldnt Suggestion: would not

flaws:
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.091 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.861 7.5
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.277 0.35

On the other hand=However, it doesn't mean 'On another hand'

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 2 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 354 350
No. of Characters: 1564 1500
No. of Different Words: 191 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.338 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.418 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.438 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 107 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 73 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 37 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 25 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.091 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.861 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.364 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.277 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.495 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.146 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5