Fifteen years ago, Omega University implemented a new procedure that encouraged students to evaluate the teaching effectiveness of all their professors. Since that time, Omega professors have begun to assign higher grades in their classes, and overall student grade averages at Omega have risen by 30 percent. Potential employers, looking at this dramatic rise in grades, believe that grades at Omega
are inflated and do not accurately reflect student achievement; as a result, Omega graduates have not been as successful at getting jobs as have graduates from nearby Alpha University. To enable its graduates to secure better jobs, Omega University should terminate student evaluation of professors.
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The argument with conclusion that Omega University should stop student evaluation of professors in order to qualify its graduates to secure better jobs is weak. It is based on premises that Omega University implemented a new procedure encouraging students to value the teaching effectiveness of all their professors fifteen years ago, that the result of this action is that professors assign higher grades in their classes, and overall student grade averages at Omega have risen by 30 percent, that potential employers believe that grades do not accurately reflect student achievement and Omega graduates have not been as successful at getting jobs as have graduates from nearby Alpha University, and that Omega graduates have not been as successful at getting jobs as have graduates from nearby Alpha University. However, it is logically flawed. There are many missing evidence needed to be provided, as in the following paragraphs.
First, the evidence that the evaluaion policy results in grade infation mainly, or more extremely, simply. If this strategy that encouraged students to evaluate the teaching effectiveness just cause that professors tends to ingratiate students other than struggling for effecient way to instruct, then, unfortunately, the conclusion might be true. Howeverm it is unlikely that no professor willing to improve their teaching skills, choosing new, interesting ways so as to make the pupils understand the materials batter. If there are some of them take this action, the results of this policy might not only the inflation but also the amelioration of eduation condition, that is , real improvement of student performance of learning. It then leaves the conclusion in doubt.
Second, the evidence that, with the knowledge of dramatic rise in grades, potential employers tend not to hire graduates from Omega University. The grade inflation is itself a implication of deception, which then indicate that students in Omega University learn less but will a score comparable to good learners, or even higher. In addition, it makes potential employer trust no such grades. Furthermore, probably, the potential employers treat the reputation of that school in vain, and degrade its graduate. In consequence, they choose not to hire them generally and makes the conclusion right.
Third, the evidence that every conditions of Omega University are the same as those of Alpha University nearby, except the seemed fool procedure and its consequence, grade infation. If it is true, then the comparison in the end of the argument make sense. It requires that the education facilities, quality of students, teachign skills of professors, and all kinds of factors which affect the final outcome of learning are the same. They should have students of equal level, with same high school proformance, same ambition of learning, and ,of course, the same level of hardworking. With this high quality of similarity, the conclusion might go wrong. For example, maybe the professors in Alpha University are better. What's more, the students in Alpha University are more intelligent. What if the utilities of Alpha University were much new, better, and effective? One of all these differences could makes different conditions, which falsifies the final inference.
In the end, the argument is rather weak. However, if the evidences that the evaluation policy results in grade infation mainly, that potential employers tend not to hire graduates from Omega University since they know the fact of grade inflation, and that every conditions except the seemed fool procedure and grade inflation of Omega University are the same as those of Alpha University are testified, the argument will be reinforced. Hence, without further explanation, it is hard to be accepted.
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Sentence: One of all these differences could makes different conditions, which falsifies the final inference.
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by a verb, present tense, 3rd person singular
Suggestion: Refer to could and makes
Sentence: First, the evidence that the evaluaion policy results in grade infation mainly, or more extremely, simply.
Error: evaluaion Suggestion: evaluation
Error: infation Suggestion: inflation
Sentence: If this strategy that encouraged students to evaluate the teaching effectiveness just cause that professors tends to ingratiate students other than struggling for effecient way to instruct, then, unfortunately, the conclusion might be true.
Error: effecient Suggestion: efficient
Sentence: If there are some of them take this action, the results of this policy might not only the inflation but also the amelioration of eduation condition, that is , real improvement of student performance of learning.
Error: eduation Suggestion: education
Sentence: Third, the evidence that every conditions of Omega University are the same as those of Alpha University nearby, except the seemed fool procedure and its consequence, grade infation.
Error: infation Suggestion: inflation
Sentence: It requires that the education facilities, quality of students, teachign skills of professors, and all kinds of factors which affect the final outcome of learning are the same.
Error: teachign Suggestion: teaching
Sentence: They should have students of equal level, with same high school proformance, same ambition of learning, and ,of course, the same level of hardworking.
Error: proformance Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: However, if the evidences that the evaluation policy results in grade infation mainly, that potential employers tend not to hire graduates from Omega University since they know the fact of grade inflation, and that every conditions except the seemed fool procedure and grade inflation of Omega University are the same as those of Alpha University are testified, the argument will be reinforced.
Error: infation Suggestion: inflation
flaws:
No. of Words: 591 350 (You may remove all examples. You don't have time to put 591 words in half an hour)
No. of Spelling Errors: 8 2 (Take 2-3 minutes check out)
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.263 0.35
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 8 2
No. of Sentences: 27 15
No. of Words: 591 350
No. of Characters: 3100 1500
No. of Different Words: 253 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.931 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.245 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.767 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 224 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 179 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 150 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 105 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.889 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 16.121 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.63 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.263 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.448 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.076 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5