Claim: Governments must ensure that their major cities receive the financial support they need in order to thrive.Reason: It is primarily in cities that a nation’s cultural traditions are preserved and generated.

Essay topics:

Claim: Governments must ensure that their major cities receive the financial support they need in order to thrive.

Reason: It is primarily in cities that a nation’s cultural traditions are preserved and generated.

It is said that major cities must be received financial support in order to progress as the cultural traditions are protected and created in them. I agree with neither claim nor reason in this argument.

The writer believes that only major cities should be supported financially because the cultural traditions originate from them. I disagree with this point of view. Most of the time we can see that rural areas or small cities in each country are the main sources of civilizations. For example, my country Iran has more than one hundred big cities that each one is divided into more than two hundred small cities which are the main place of historical buildings. Most of these cities need a budget to renovate themselves. Some small cities such as Hamedan which is in danger of natural disasters such as earthquakes. This city is one of the most important small cities in Iran as the most beautiful historical places are placed in. But unfortunately, we can see that more attention is about some big cities such as Tehran, just because it is the capital of Iran. Tehran is an industrial city and there is no cultural tradition in this city but most of the budget is spent on it. I believe that the bigness of the city does not mean that it is a source of the cultural traditions of a nation. When we refer to history and look at the lives of our ancestors, we can see that most of the civilizations originate from rural areas or small cities.

It is true that governments should give financial support to big cities but they should not overlook the small cities. They should have enough plans for the distribution of the budget between the cities. Also, for having the right distribution, governors must be controlled in order not to commit a crime such as embezzlement. Each country has some big cities and each big city has some small regions. For the renovation of all regions covered, the council of each city should be given enough budget. This budget should be allocated based on the needs and situations of each city. The bigness or the smallness of the cities should not be the priority.

To summarize, in my view, only big cities should not be sponsored just because they are mistakenly considered as a source of cultural traditions.

Votes
Average: 5 (1 vote)
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Essays by user p30kh40 :

Comments

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, if, look, so, for example, such as, in my view, it is true

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 19.5258426966 118% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.4196629213 113% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 14.8657303371 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.3162921348 106% => OK
Pronoun: 36.0 33.0505617978 109% => OK
Preposition: 46.0 58.6224719101 78% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 12.9106741573 54% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1859.0 2235.4752809 83% => OK
No of words: 395.0 442.535393258 89% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.70632911392 5.05705443957 93% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.45809453852 4.55969084622 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.59235561662 2.79657885939 93% => OK
Unique words: 170.0 215.323595506 79% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.430379746835 0.4932671777 87% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 579.6 704.065955056 82% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 6.24550561798 176% => OK
Article: 3.0 4.99550561798 60% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.10617977528 32% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.77640449438 56% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.38483146067 46% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.2370786517 104% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 23.0359550562 78% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 35.1173607343 60.3974514979 58% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 88.5238095238 118.986275619 74% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.8095238095 23.4991977007 80% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.28571428571 5.21951772744 63% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 7.80617977528 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 10.2758426966 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 5.13820224719 117% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.83258426966 207% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.289621516038 0.243740707755 119% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.104628716757 0.0831039109588 126% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0838823626494 0.0758088955206 111% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.204307053122 0.150359130593 136% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0865467395723 0.0667264976115 130% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.2 14.1392134831 72% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 48.8420337079 126% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.92365168539 39% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 12.1743820225 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.04 12.1639044944 83% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.41 8.38706741573 88% => OK
difficult_words: 72.0 100.480337079 72% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 11.8971910112 67% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.2143820225 82% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.7820224719 85% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.


Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.