"In many countries it is now possible to turn on the television and view government at work. Watching these proceedings can help people understand the issues that affect their lives. The more kinds of government proceedings---trials, debates, meetings, et

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"In many countries it is now possible to turn on the television and view government at work. Watching these proceedings can help people understand the issues that affect their lives. The more kinds of government proceedings---trials, debates, meetings, etc.---that are televised, the more society will benefit."

The author asserts that the possibility of watching the government activities by means of television has provided benefits for the society. And he also claims that these beneficial effects will increase by more televised government proceedings. While the author overstates about the influence of these broadcasted governmental activities, I tend to concede that these online programs can be helpful in some respects.

Admittedly, the author’s claim that these benefits for the society will increase by more televised government proceedings cannot be substantially corroborated. First, monitoring the activities of the administrators and representatives even with close scrutiny would not guarantee a healthy and successful society. There are other critical factors imbedded in the population which can lead to immoral or socially harmful problems. And these crucial issues such as increase in resorting to violence or addiction can be tackled only by adopting intellectual measures. Undoubtedly such these approaches require wise and scholar administrators with proper consultant rather than just controlling the people in authority which might not even posses the adequate knowledge or skill.

Second, even if watching the government activities would be of high importance and efficiency, it would not be an simple task for ordinary people to control and discern the accuracy and honesty in their activities. In other words, this arduous responsibility demands proficient people in law and political affairs.

However, broadcasting the governmental trials would be a decent step in decreasing the governmental mysteries and unrevealed course of actions as an appropriate factor towards more democratic society. The residents can gradually be aware of the decisions of the government and become more sensitive or even show their disagreement about the unfair or unpleasant activities of the government. And it can be concluded that they will have greater opportunity to live in a more permissive and liberal society in comparison with the time when it was impossible to follow the government activities.

In addition, this televising would provide a sense of trust and security for the populace who are seeing the government trials in front of their eyes without any doubt. This fact not only helps the people to feel more satisfied and to be efficiently productive for the society, but also warrants the strength of government.

In sum, it would not be reasonable to think that televising the government activities would be highly influential in helping the society due to numerous social issues related to other factors such as public awareness or wise people in authority. Nonetheless, this course of action would carry some useful benefits such as uncovering possible clandestine affairs of the government and restricting its unfair activities and finally providing a more satisfied and efficient populace.

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2014-10-12 zahravakili 80 view
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these benefits for the society will increase by more televised government proceedings cannot be substantially corroborated.
Description: two verbs in one sentence.

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Score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 442 350
No. of Characters: 2436 1500
No. of Different Words: 224 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.585 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.511 4.6
Word Length SD: 3.05 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 191 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 158 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 121 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 90 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.129 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.647 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.337 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.605 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.065 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5