Some people believe that the purpose of education is to free the mind and the spirit. Others believe that formal education tends to restrain our minds and spirits rather than set them free.
Write a response in which you discuss which view more closely aligns with your own position and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should address both of the views presented.
The people’s view on the purpose of education is multifarious, and consequently, the ramification of education is also debatable. Although some people think that formal education incarcerates people’s mind, I adamantly believe that formal education plays a crucial role in liberating people’s mind and spirit.
Granted, formal education was abused by those empowered to restrict people’s mind throughout the history. Blatant as it may sound, North Korea could be the epitome of this. In the beginning of the autocracy of Kim il-sung, he ordered some prominent scholars to invent “Juche-ism,” which is consequently infused to the students to brainwash them. Furthermore, Juche-ism was so sophisticated yet enticing that it proselytized many other foreigners and even South Korean congressman, inveigling them to insurge against South Korean government. Let alone this flagrant example, there are many cases throughout history where monarchs brainwashed their people by setting ideologies that justifies their governance as their national motto.
Despite the previous case, however, the contribution of formal education on liberating people’s mind and spirit cannot be underestimated. Take science, one of the pillars of modern society, as an example. It may sound ironical, but the shift of scientific paradigm is enabled by people who are conversant to the formal education; because the shift of scientific paradigm is the process of logically dismantling the previous paradigm, people should know well about the pre-shift paradigm through formal education. In addition to this historical example, the role of basic liberal arts and science that is taught in school through formal education should not be neglected.
In conclusion, despite the possible negative effect of formal education, I believe that formal education has a certain effect on freeing people’s mind and spirit. Therefore, the politicians should not overlook the impact of formal education when enacting laws pertinent to it.
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Comments
Essay evaluations by e-grader
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, furthermore, however, if, look, may, so, therefore, well, even so, in addition, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 19.5258426966 67% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 12.4196629213 56% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 14.8657303371 54% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.3162921348 88% => OK
Pronoun: 22.0 33.0505617978 67% => OK
Preposition: 40.0 58.6224719101 68% => OK
Nominalization: 19.0 12.9106741573 147% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1716.0 2235.4752809 77% => OK
No of words: 299.0 442.535393258 68% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.73913043478 5.05705443957 113% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.1583189471 4.55969084622 91% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.0804509367 2.79657885939 110% => OK
Unique words: 173.0 215.323595506 80% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.578595317726 0.4932671777 117% => OK
syllable_count: 525.6 704.065955056 75% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.8 1.59117977528 113% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 6.24550561798 64% => OK
Article: 5.0 4.99550561798 100% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.77640449438 113% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.38483146067 114% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 20.2370786517 64% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 23.0 23.0359550562 100% => OK
Sentence length SD: 60.7257877823 60.3974514979 101% => OK
Chars per sentence: 132.0 118.986275619 111% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.0 23.4991977007 98% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.07692307692 5.21951772744 174% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 7.80617977528 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 10.2758426966 68% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 5.13820224719 39% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.83258426966 83% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.322720481226 0.243740707755 132% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.114363831278 0.0831039109588 138% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.108034067734 0.0758088955206 143% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.215269049149 0.150359130593 143% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.104254851047 0.0667264976115 156% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.1 14.1392134831 121% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 31.21 48.8420337079 64% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.92365168539 141% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.6 12.1743820225 120% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 16.31 12.1639044944 134% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.69 8.38706741573 116% => OK
difficult_words: 93.0 100.480337079 93% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.0 11.8971910112 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 11.2143820225 100% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, furthermore, however, if, look, may, so, therefore, well, even so, in addition, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 19.5258426966 67% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 12.4196629213 56% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 14.8657303371 54% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.3162921348 88% => OK
Pronoun: 22.0 33.0505617978 67% => OK
Preposition: 40.0 58.6224719101 68% => OK
Nominalization: 19.0 12.9106741573 147% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1716.0 2235.4752809 77% => OK
No of words: 299.0 442.535393258 68% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.73913043478 5.05705443957 113% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.1583189471 4.55969084622 91% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.0804509367 2.79657885939 110% => OK
Unique words: 173.0 215.323595506 80% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.578595317726 0.4932671777 117% => OK
syllable_count: 525.6 704.065955056 75% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.8 1.59117977528 113% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 6.24550561798 64% => OK
Article: 5.0 4.99550561798 100% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.77640449438 113% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.38483146067 114% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 20.2370786517 64% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 23.0 23.0359550562 100% => OK
Sentence length SD: 60.7257877823 60.3974514979 101% => OK
Chars per sentence: 132.0 118.986275619 111% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.0 23.4991977007 98% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.07692307692 5.21951772744 174% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 7.80617977528 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 10.2758426966 68% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 5.13820224719 39% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.83258426966 83% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.322720481226 0.243740707755 132% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.114363831278 0.0831039109588 138% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.108034067734 0.0758088955206 143% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.215269049149 0.150359130593 143% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.104254851047 0.0667264976115 156% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.1 14.1392134831 121% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 31.21 48.8420337079 64% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.92365168539 141% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.6 12.1743820225 120% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 16.31 12.1639044944 134% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.69 8.38706741573 116% => OK
difficult_words: 93.0 100.480337079 93% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.0 11.8971910112 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 11.2143820225 100% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.