Young people should be encouraged to pursue long-term, realistic goals rather than seek immediate fame and recognition.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.
In a world, where earning more money and fame has become many people’s goals, lots of young people pursue immediate fame and recognition in order to gain the reputation or make money. Thus, some people say that young people should be encouraged to pursue long-term, realistic goals rather than seek immediate fame and recognition. Despite this claim seems to be reasonable, I still cannot fully agree with this recommendation.
To begin with, I have to agree that young people should be encouraged to pursue long-term, realistic goals. This is because people are more likely to be successful if they go for it step by step. More specifically, if young people who don’t have good grades always dream to be admitted to the Harvard University, they will be hindered by these unrealistic goals because they will be disappointed every time they fail the exam and may give up eventually. Therefore, they should be encouraged to have long-term, more realistic goals. For instance, they should at first increase their grades from D to A gradually and then they could have the chances to be admitted by their dream schools. Thus, under this circumstance, being encouraged to pursue long-term, realistic goals will help young people have good foundations, which can be used to achieve bigger goals.
I also agree that pursuing the immediate fame and recognition may be not beneficial for the development of the young and may harm the people they love. At first, it is very hard for people to earn the immediate fame and recognition. Thus, some young people will do some outrageous things in order to earn them. For example, a TicToker wanted to attract more people to view his videos. He started to shoot some videos, in which he mimicked the dangerous postures, such as throwing his daughter. In his last video, he threw his daughter again and failed to catch her. His daughter got the prognosis from the doctor that she may not be able to walk in the future. Therefore, some young people who are irrational may do everything just to pursue the fame and recognition. Under this circumstance, the recommendation is advantageous.
However, immediate fame and recognition may be good things sometimes. Not all young people are irrational and they want to get the immediate fame and recognition because they have long-term goals, which can be achieved when they have fame and recognition. At the same time, they spare no effort to make improvements in order to be famous and recognized. For instance, Billie Eilish has dreamed to become a singer as she likes Justin Bieber. However, without the fame and recognition, she cannot even get her songs heard by the public. Therefore, she created songs, recorded them and uploaded them to YouTube. One day her songs were found by Justin, who at last requested to cooperate with her. She earned the immediate fame and recognition and becomes a singer. Thus, some young people get immediate fame and recognition because of their long-time efforts on their goals. In this case, young people shouldn’t be discouraged and the recommendation will be undermined.
By and large, encouraging the young to have long-term, realistic goals is always correct, from my perspective, and yet the ways to get the immediate fame and recognition are different. If people want to get them through their own long-term efforts, it is unreasonable to discourage them. However, if they do outrageous things, like the young father mentioned before, they should be discouraged or even blamed. Therefore, the recommendation, in my viewpoint, is partly advantageous for people who take it.
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Comments
Essay evaluations by e-grader
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, however, if, may, so, still, then, therefore, thus, for example, for instance, such as, by and large, in my view, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 30.0 19.5258426966 154% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 21.0 12.4196629213 169% => OK
Conjunction : 27.0 14.8657303371 182% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.3162921348 115% => OK
Pronoun: 61.0 33.0505617978 185% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 69.0 58.6224719101 118% => OK
Nominalization: 22.0 12.9106741573 170% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3013.0 2235.4752809 135% => OK
No of words: 596.0 442.535393258 135% => OK
Chars per words: 5.05536912752 5.05705443957 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.94096258147 4.55969084622 108% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.84628401784 2.79657885939 102% => OK
Unique words: 249.0 215.323595506 116% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.417785234899 0.4932671777 85% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 920.7 704.065955056 131% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 17.0 6.24550561798 272% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 3.0 4.99550561798 60% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.77640449438 56% => OK
Preposition: 15.0 4.38483146067 342% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 32.0 20.2370786517 158% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 23.0359550562 78% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 44.8975287286 60.3974514979 74% => OK
Chars per sentence: 94.15625 118.986275619 79% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.625 23.4991977007 79% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.375 5.21951772744 84% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 7.80617977528 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 21.0 10.2758426966 204% => Less positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 5.13820224719 175% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.83258426966 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.339941563444 0.243740707755 139% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.106929956723 0.0831039109588 129% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0944142218913 0.0758088955206 125% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.229931232946 0.150359130593 153% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0576195618505 0.0667264976115 86% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.7 14.1392134831 83% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 48.8420337079 126% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 12.1743820225 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.07 12.1639044944 99% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.1 8.38706741573 85% => OK
difficult_words: 97.0 100.480337079 97% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 11.8971910112 97% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.2143820225 82% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, however, if, may, so, still, then, therefore, thus, for example, for instance, such as, by and large, in my view, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 30.0 19.5258426966 154% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 21.0 12.4196629213 169% => OK
Conjunction : 27.0 14.8657303371 182% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.3162921348 115% => OK
Pronoun: 61.0 33.0505617978 185% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 69.0 58.6224719101 118% => OK
Nominalization: 22.0 12.9106741573 170% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3013.0 2235.4752809 135% => OK
No of words: 596.0 442.535393258 135% => OK
Chars per words: 5.05536912752 5.05705443957 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.94096258147 4.55969084622 108% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.84628401784 2.79657885939 102% => OK
Unique words: 249.0 215.323595506 116% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.417785234899 0.4932671777 85% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 920.7 704.065955056 131% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 17.0 6.24550561798 272% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 3.0 4.99550561798 60% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.77640449438 56% => OK
Preposition: 15.0 4.38483146067 342% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 32.0 20.2370786517 158% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 23.0359550562 78% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 44.8975287286 60.3974514979 74% => OK
Chars per sentence: 94.15625 118.986275619 79% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.625 23.4991977007 79% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.375 5.21951772744 84% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 7.80617977528 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 21.0 10.2758426966 204% => Less positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 5.13820224719 175% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.83258426966 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.339941563444 0.243740707755 139% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.106929956723 0.0831039109588 129% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0944142218913 0.0758088955206 125% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.229931232946 0.150359130593 153% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0576195618505 0.0667264976115 86% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.7 14.1392134831 83% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 48.8420337079 126% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 12.1743820225 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.07 12.1639044944 99% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.1 8.38706741573 85% => OK
difficult_words: 97.0 100.480337079 97% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 11.8971910112 97% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.2143820225 82% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.