The diagrams below show how chocolate is made and how the price of a chocolate bar is divided up among those involved in the process.
The diagram represents the mathod of chocolate making and the pie chart highlights information how the price of chocolate is dividied in those which are related in process.
It is clearly seen that first of all chocolate is granded in grander then waste is saprated and chocoa liquod is contain in a big chocoa liquor. After that half proportion of liquod is sent in industry for making chocolate and left chocolate liauod is sent for pressing then some pressed chocolate is made ready with chocoa butter for industrial chocolate, sugar and other ingredients are mixed in industrial chocolate to make a chocolate bar. Some pressed is convert in chocoa powder and sent in food industry .
The given chart highlights the prices of chocolate bar after completed making process , maximum (37%) price is divided cost of ingredients and overhrads where as minimum (4%) to farmer. Supermaket is given 3% less than cost of ingredients and overheads but 15% is divided tax and chocolate company is divided 10% out of 100%
It is, there for, clear that each stage is important from making to given price , if one step is missed then whole process is distroyed.
- Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to co-operate rather than compete become more useful adults.Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. 55
- A lot of administrative work is done after the IELTS test Below is a chart showing what happens to IELTS candidates performance after the candidates have taken their test 74
- The two pie charts show the petterns of expenditure in the US between 1966 1996 83
- Some people consider that thinking about and planning for the future to be a wastage of time. They argue that people should simple live in moment . Do you agree or disagree and what is your opinion? 63
- The diagrams below show how chocolate is made and how the price of a chocolate bar is divided up among those involved in the process 70
Sentence: It is clearly seen that first of all chocolate is granded in grander then waste is saprated and chocoa liquod is contain in a big chocoa liquor.
Description: The fragment grander then waste is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace then with adjective
Sentence: The diagram represents the mathod of chocolate making and the pie chart highlights information how the price of chocolate is dividied in those which are related in process.
Error: dividied Suggestion: divided
Error: mathod Suggestion: method
Sentence: It is clearly seen that first of all chocolate is granded in grander then waste is saprated and chocoa liquod is contain in a big chocoa liquor.
Error: liquod Suggestion: liquid
Error: saprated Suggestion: sperated
Error: granded Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: chocoa Suggestion: cocoa
Sentence: After that half proportion of liquod is sent in industry for making chocolate and left chocolate liauod is sent for pressing then some pressed chocolate is made ready with chocoa butter for industrial chocolate, sugar and other ingredients are mixed in industrial chocolate to make a chocolate bar.
Error: liquod Suggestion: liquid
Error: liauod Suggestion: liquid
Error: chocoa Suggestion: cocoa
Sentence: Some pressed is convert in chocoa powder and sent in food industry .
Error: chocoa Suggestion: cocoa
Sentence: The given chart highlights the prices of chocolate bar after completed making process , maximum 37 price is divided cost of ingredients and overhrads where as minimum 4 to farmer.
Error: overhrads Suggestion: overheads
Sentence: It is, there for, clear that each stage is important from making to given price , if one step is missed then whole process is distroyed.
Error: distroyed Suggestion: destroyed
flaws:
No. of Spelling Errors: 12 2
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 12 2
No. of Sentences: 7 10
No. of Words: 194 200
No. of Characters: 930 1000
No. of Different Words: 105 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.732 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.794 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.59 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 68 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 50 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 32 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 27 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 27.714 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.823 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.571 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.461 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.786 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.126 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4