The essay requirement is " The diagrams below show the site of a school in 2004 and the plan for the changes to school site in 2024. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features,and make comparisons when relevant."

Essay topics:

The essay requirement is " The diagrams below show the site of a school in 2004 and the plan for the changes to school site in 2024. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features,and make comparisons when relevant."

The layout gives information about the current structure of a certain school location and the plan to redevelop this with the span of 20 years.Overall , the location on 2024 will changed considerably. These includes additional facilities as well as increased in the population of the students.

Looking at the map on details, In 2004 ,only two edifices available for the students , one is proximate to main entrance at northeastern part of the lay-out and the second building is in the middle of the first map. Between this two schools , there is a pah going to the sport arena which is placed at the eastern part of the drawing. Outside the school vicinity , in front of main entrance , there is one parking lot available. Meanwhile, the total number of students are 600.

By 2024 , the suggested plans is the suggested plans are as follows: to create another building for the students which will be developed on eastern part of the map in replaced of sport field. The sport area will be relocated in southeastern part of the lay-out and the size will be reduced into halves.Also , the projected plan is to increase 400 more students. Moreover, one car park is to be added and this will be developed behind the third building ,in front of the gymnasium.

Votes
Average: 7 (2 votes)
This essay topic by users
Post date Users Rates Link to Content
2013-08-12 marjloveselmo 70 view
Essay Categories
Essays by user marjloveselmo :

Comments

Sentence: Overall , the location on 2024 will changed considerably.
Description: The word will is not usually used as a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: will be changed

These includes additional facilities as well as increased in the population of the students.
Suggestion: These include additional facilities as well as increased population of the students.

Between this two schools
Suggestion: Between two schools

Sentence: By 2024 , the suggested plans is the suggested plans are as follows: to create another building for the students which will be developed on eastern part of the map in replaced of sport field.
Description: The fragment the suggested plans is not usually followed by is
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace is with are

Sentence: Looking at the map on details, In 2004 ,only two edifices available for the students , one is proximate to main entrance at northeastern part of the lay-out and the second building is in the middle of the first map.
Error: lay-out Suggestion: layout

Sentence: Between this two schools , there is a pah going to the sport arena which is placed at the eastern part of the drawing.
Error: pah Suggestion: path

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 2 2
No. of Sentences: 9 10
No. of Words: 218 200
No. of Characters: 1006 1000
No. of Different Words: 111 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.843 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.615 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.527 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 67 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 57 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 39 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 21 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.222 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.908 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.444 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.408 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.602 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.084 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 3 4