keeping animals in captivity is cruel. there is no reason for zoos to exist in the 21st century. how do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
In the catastrophic world, benevolence has been decreased. There are many kind of effort which firstly conducted to human kind becoming materialistic. Animal conservation program is one of them. For the first time it was constructed to support wildlife from the extinction, but nowadays it become business area.
Keeping animal in cage is cruel. It make they cannot feel like in their home. They not live in their natural ecosystem. Their new generation which born in the zoo will never feel their real habitat. For example, the Lion baby live in the zoo, which should be as a king of the jungle, suppose to be the top carnivore in food chain. However, in the cage of the zoo, they cannot become one. In addition, their adaptation skill decreased.
on the other hand, breeding animal in the animal park still necessary. Because any zoo have offer new trend way to provide the animal natural approach. For example, there are Safari park in Bogor and Jawa Timur park in East Java which allow animal move freely. According to the Journal of Wildlife, animal live in that kind of zoo which designed like natural life growth like in their own world. They can run, roar, and hunt like in the jungle.
Moreover, there are advantages from the animal park, such as they can guide the existence of scare animals. They can be extinct when they live in their own world because of human exploitation. It also can be educating media for the children, as they can observe how beasts supposed to live in real environment.
In summaries, zoos existence is needed, but in different face. Nevertheless there is no prototype of zoo which represent of zoo which represent the real wild world.
- the charts 45
- keeping animals in captivity is cruel. there is no reason for zoos to exist in the 21st century. how do you agree or disagree with this opinion? 70
- In some countries, advertisers increase the amount of advertising which try to persuade children to buy snacks, toys, and other goods. Parents object to such pressure on children. but some advertisers claim that there is useful information in the advertis 53
Sentence: For the first time it was constructed to support wildlife from the extinction, but nowadays it become business area.
Description: The fragment it become business is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace become with verb, past tense
Sentence: It make they cannot feel like in their home.
Description: The fragment It make they is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace make with verb, past tense
Sentence: Their new generation which born in the zoo will never feel their real habitat.
Description: A WH-determiner is not usually followed by a verb, past participle
Suggestion: Refer to which and born
Sentence: For example, the Lion baby live in the zoo, which should be as a king of the jungle, suppose to be the top carnivore in food chain.
Description: The fragment baby live in is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace live with verb, past participle
Sentence: Because any zoo have offer new trend way to provide the animal natural approach.
Description: A verb 'to have', uninflected present tense, infinitive or is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to have and offer
Sentence: According to the Journal of Wildlife, animal live in that kind of zoo which designed like natural life growth like in their own world.
Description: The fragment animal live in is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace live with verb, past participle
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Words: 289 350
No. of Different Words: 156 200
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 289 350
No. of Characters: 1340 1500
No. of Different Words: 156 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.123 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.637 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.386 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 79 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 58 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 39 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 27 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 13.762 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.919 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.571 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.299 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.513 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.08 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5