Keeping animals in captivity is cruel There is no reason for zoos to exist in the 21st century How far do you agree or disagree with this option

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Keeping animals in captivity is cruel. There is no reason for zoos to exist in the 21st century. How far do you agree or disagree with this option.

Animals is the one part of creature of God. In this era, some people keep animals in captivity. A few people think that is cruel for animals. In this century, there is pro and contra about that.

First of all is about negative effects if people put animals in humper. Animals are animal being, they need to freedom in their life with life in forest as their mullet. They could be life with their families and groups, then they are be able to learn how to survive in wildlife. Therefore, animals are stayed in humper, and they are unhappy because they just do their activities in stable. Day by day, they have to bored and angry because all of people obtain to see all of their activities. That is torturing animals. Eventhough, keeping animals in a place help government to avoid rare animals from extinct because that is saving animals from hunter.

Secondly is about possitive effects to lay animals in cage. Place to rescuing animals from unobligation people such zoo may help numerous children to get information about animals. Pupils possible to know about kinds of animals. If juvenils directly learn in zoo, it would make them more understand and care about animals. Besides, zoo creates new job vacancies for communities around there because zoo needs a few crew to arrange place and animal there. However, if people built zoo, they should make new place and cut many trees. That could decrease green field. According to Martin Bush, as world’s inhabitant, human must keep animals from unresponsible people to avoid from wiped out, but do not make a cruel with animals.

This bring us to the conclude that people are able to protect animals to continue their life, but every person has different ways to keep them.

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2013-06-11 indah 66 view
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Animals is the one part of creature of God.
Suggestion: Animals are the one part of creature of God.

Sentence: If juvenils directly learn in zoo, it would make them more understand and care about animals.
Description: The fragment more understand and is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace understand with verb, past participle

Sentence: This bring us to the conclude that people are able to protect animals to continue their life, but every person has different ways to keep them.
Description: The fragment This bring us is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace bring with verb, present tense, 3rd person singular
Description: The token the is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to the and conclude

Sentence: In this century, there is pro and contra about that.
Error: contra Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: First of all is about negative effects if people put animals in humper.
Error: humper Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: Secondly is about possitive effects to lay animals in cage.
Error: possitive Suggestion: positive

Sentence: Place to rescuing animals from unobligation people such zoo may help numerous children to get information about animals.
Error: unobligation Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: If juvenils directly learn in zoo, it would make them more understand and care about animals.
Error: juvenils Suggestion: juvenile

Sentence: According to Martin Bush, as world's inhabitant, human must keep animals from unresponsible people to avoid from wiped out, but do not make a cruel with animals.
Error: unresponsible Suggestion: No alternate word

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 6 2
Avg. Sentence Length: 14.9 21.0

Read a grammar book.

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 6 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 298 350
No. of Characters: 1386 1500
No. of Different Words: 160 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.155 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.651 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.245 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 93 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 67 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 31 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 17 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 14.9 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.602 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.344 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.49 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.134 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5