Most developed countries spend a large proportion of their heath budgets on expensive medical technology and procedures This money should be spent instead on health education to keep people well To what extent do you agree or disagree

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Most developed countries spend a large proportion of their heath budgets on expensive medical technology and procedures. This money should be spent instead on health education to keep people well. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In most countries, governments spend large amount of their health budget on advanced medical technologies. On the other hand, most developed countries, are very cautious concerning thriving medical education. So what is the best choice of solving this problem?

It is commonly accepted that, most diseases are treated with the help of latest medical technologies. For example, there is no difference whether the doctor is quite well-educated, if he is not provided with the equipments he needs. In addition, latest medical technologies, allow doctors to win time as well as to simplify their operations. For instance, in past times any simple operation were taking days in order to be lasted, but nowadays with the help of latest technologies both doctors spend less time during operations, and patient face with noticeable less pain as well as the tension of operations.

On the other hand, we must acknowledge that, medical system basically assessed with the knowledge of the people specialized in this field. For example, no matter what kind of technology are the doctors provided if they do not have a brain to use it. Therefore, governments should pay their medical budget on providing high education rather than purchasing every latest equipments for their medical system. In addition, developing the educational system will help the countries to save a great amount of money if they tend to be more attentive in it. For instance, it is more economical to educate one person (who can invent some revolutionary medical equipment as well) rather than ordering any advanced technology from abroad.

In conclusion, I would like to reiterate that, developing medical education is more appropriate way for governments. On one hand children are educated, and on the other hand governments acts economically in this way.

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Sentence: For example, no matter what kind of technology are the doctors provided if they do not have a brain to use it.
Description: The fragment kind of technology is not usually followed by are
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace are with is

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Attribute Value Ideal
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Category: Good Excellent
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No. of Words: 291 350
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Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.13 4.7
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Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.094 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5