Shopping has become a favorite pastime among young people.
Why do you think it is like that.
Do you think they must be encouraged to do other things rather than shopping?
Nowadays many people go shopping in their leisure time that has turned into preference among youth. It happens because of these days ostentatious life, for passing time and parents charge for their children packet. Government and parents are responsible to encourage youth to some lucrative activities.
Recently, most of the people hang out for keeping up with Jones because of this days luxuries life and they have propensity for show off what ever they have. For example, woman often change their house furniture, curtain or kitchen utensil and go shopping to find new brand and modern things. So because of showing off they waste a lot of money and time in shopping center.
In addition, shopping has become a common hobby for passing time among youth people. For instance, girl and boy because lack of recreational center or other place to pass their time with together inevitably go shopping center. Further more, parents, because of working all around clock, don’t pay attention to their children and give them packet money as much as they need and spend money for unnecessary things.
There fore, I strongly recommend that parent should pat extra attention to monitor own self and their kids expenses and encourage their children do some other beneficial activities like sport or education and spend their time and money in benefit activities.
To make long story short, turning shopping as a habit effect by this days flamboyant lives and results in drastic problems in the personal and social lives and valuable habit like sports may vanish. both parents and government should be careful about this matter.
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for passing time and parents charge for their children packet.
Description: 'and' is used wrongly here.
For instance, girl and boy because lack of recreational center or other place to pass their time with together inevitably go shopping center.
Description: can you re-write this sentence? check out online how to use Because and because of
Sentence: There fore, I strongly recommend that parent should pat extra attention to monitor own self and their kids expenses and encourage their children do some other beneficial activities like sport or education and spend their time and money in benefit activities.
Description: The word pat is not usually used as a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to pat
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
Need to improve the language and sentences.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.5 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 11 15
No. of Words: 267 350
No. of Characters: 1323 1500
No. of Different Words: 158 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.042 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.955 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.349 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 94 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 69 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 42 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 22 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.273 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.402 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.455 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.381 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.672 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.083 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5