Some people think that travel helps gaining knowledge but others think that TV and internet play an important role in gaining knowledge. Discuss both views, and give your opinion.
People have different views from which a person could effectively and efficiently learn. Some claim that travelling is the major step, but I tend to believe that watching TV and browsing the internet are the keys in acquiring knowledge.
On the one hand, travel helps people to gain knowledge. Through this activity, every person will have an actual experience by basically exploring the primary features of a particular destination. Tourists, for example, have the privilege to see and experience different set of things and activities that a country have. As a result, these opportunities will drastically increase their ideas.
In addition, travelling will help every person to broadly widen their cultural-background of a certain nation. When a person explores a particular place, a significant part of this is the mingling with the country's people. Consequently, a traveler will learn their identity, culture and even some of their historical aspects.
On the other hand, I regard TV and internet as the most effective tools to efficiently acquire knowledge. These technological advancements are by far the most accessible for every person. Families'homes, for instance, automatically have TV and various gadgets that can connect online. Hence, members of the family, especially children, could learn different ideas easily and conveniently.
Another important reason is, websites and TV programs provide more technical and updated form of information. The internet gives a vast selection of different kinds of topics, it offers a lot of latest articles and even pod-casts. Meanwhile, the TV features updated news and scientifically-informative programs such as animal planet and national geographic channel.
To end, there are a lot of ways to learn, however, browsing online medias and watching variety of TV programs are the most important ways.
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flaws:
Sentence Length SD: 4.514 7.5
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.025 0.07
Same flaws for most of your essays. Try this writing style, it may get better performance:
Para 1: introduction. my choice: A or B. agree or disagree. (you are ok)
Para 2:First,reason 1 (1 sentence) + why reason 1(some arguments. 2-3 sentences) + examples for reason 1 (around 2 sentences) + small conclusions (like advantages of reason 1 or comparisons if not reason 1, 1-2 sentences). (follow this way)
Para 3:Second,reason 2 ,blabla... do the same thing like First (follow this way)
Para 4:Third, reason 3 blabla... do the same thing like First but shorter (follow this way)
Para 5: Conclusion. (you are ok)
Look, you have topic sentence and examples, but don't have why reason 1 and
small conclusions.
Let us know if you din't get the point.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 7.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 286 350
No. of Characters: 1525 1500
No. of Different Words: 166 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.112 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.332 4.6
Word Length SD: 3.192 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 117 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 92 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 71 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 45 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.824 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 4.514 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.588 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.296 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.59 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.025 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5