Successful sport professionals can earn a great deal more many than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair.Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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Successful sport professionals can earn a great deal more many than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays, a new phenomenon appears in sports. Some successful sports professionals could receive more money, and it is different with people who work in important position. This essay would discuss about that problem.

Some people believe that sports become commercial business. Most of successful sports athletes get many incomes from some sources such as wage and job offering. As a result, they deserve to accept more salary. Some advertisements show famous football player to promote sports product. For example, there are some popular football players such as Lionel Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo who are represent this condition, and based on some news they could buy expensive goods such as expensive cars and luxurious resort.

On the other side, other people argue there are differences income between successful sports professionals and employers who have job in some companies. They believe that it is unfair because of there is a gap of income. Some employers must work hard for 7 days to get revenue, and some people hold vital position in some particular companies but they are not in equal income because workers simply acquire average of income from their occupation.

In my point of view, some football players become one of beneficial commodity for their football clubs. For instance, a football club sells players who have special ability and other football clubs are interested to bid players who have talented. Moreover, there is a big deal among football clubs, and several transaction index record that price to get famous football player is very expensive, even could pass over the company’s transaction. In contrast, some workers do not have expectation to earn much income. Although, they are in top management because their companies give permanent regulation to organize workers salary or revenue, and employers accept their wage every month. This condition is very different with successful sports athletes.

To conclude, sports business could give many payment for popular football players. As a result, they are able to fulfill their tertiary needs such as expensive vehicles and beautiful mansions, but this phenomenon is very contrast with employers who have occupation in particular company, and then some vital workers are not in equal position because they are attain definite income than successful sports professionals. So, this is unfair bacause it could make discrepancy among them.

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Sentence: So, this is unfair bacause it could make discrepancy among them.
Error: bacause Suggestion: because

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 7.5 out of 9
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 381 350
No. of Characters: 1996 1500
No. of Different Words: 183 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.418 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.239 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.558 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 156 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 118 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 78 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 48 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.05 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.981 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.45 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.328 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.521 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.077 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5