You will move to a new city for work. You know some people who live there.-ask them for help finding accommodation-tell them where you would like to live-tell them the type of place you are looking for

Dear James
How have you been up to lately? I have a great news to share with you. I have just been promoted to the IT Manager for our company Snowman Enterprises Pty. Ltd. located at the city.

As you already know me, I don't have big circle of friends living in the city except for you. Therefore, I really need your help this time for finding me an accommodation out there as this is cumbersome task demanding frequent conversation with real state agency and inspection of sites.

As far as location is concerned, I would not mind place which is on walking distance from my office. But, however, I would prefer plentiful convenience stores and cafes around the place as I hardly cook food by my own.

Lastly, I am not really fussy about the type of an accommodation such as a unit or a studio or a apartment as long as it has a private bathroom, a lounge area, a bedroom and a kitchen with all up to date heating and cooling system.

I appreciate your time and invaluable help for me.

Take care

Thanks
Binod

Votes
Average: 7 (1 vote)
Essays by the user:

this is cumbersome task
this is a cumbersome task

I would not mind place which is on walking distance from my office.
I would not mind the place which is in the walking distance from my office.

But, however,
But or however, one is enough.

flaws:
More compound or complex sentences wanted. Can you put those two sentences as one sentence?
I don't have big circle of friends living in the city except for you. Therefore, I really need your help this time for finding me an accommodation out there...

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 11 10
No. of Words: 189 200
No. of Characters: 799 1000
No. of Different Words: 125 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.708 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.228 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.529 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 50 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 33 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 19 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 14 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.182 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 12.705 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.364 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.352 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.812 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.126 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 4