thi IELTS Writing Task 1 ng y 01 07 2021 Task 1 The table shows information about department stores and online stores in Australia in 2011

Essay topics:

Đề thi IELTS Writing Task 1 ngày 01-07-2021
Task 1: The table shows information about department stores and online stores in Australia in 2011.

Shown is the table contrasting the statistics of Australian department stores and online stores about 4 distinct types of information, namely the number of businesses, profit, sales revenue and the growth in 2011.
It is perceptible that online stores reported a higher figure than department stores in all mentioned aspects. Furthermore, although there was a marked difference in the number of businesses, that in profit, income and growth rate was clearly marginal.
In 2011, only 67 department stores were in operation while this number of the other was nearly 6 times higher with 368 businesses. Notwithstanding the more in number, online stores recorded 863 million AUD in profit which was unremarkably larger than traditional retailing’s by just 56 million AUD.
In the interim, the sales incomes in both online stores and department stores were 13,400 million and
12,700 million Australian dollars respectively. Besides, the growth rate of the former was at 0.6%, which was higher than that of department stores by 0,2%.

Votes
Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
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Essays by user kevann :

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 4, column 102, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...epartment stores were 13,400 million and 12,700 million Australian dollars respec...
^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
besides, furthermore, if, while

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 7.0 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 0.0 1.00243902439 0% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 6.8 74% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 3.15609756098 158% => OK
Pronoun: 5.0 5.60731707317 89% => OK
Preposition: 22.0 33.7804878049 65% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 3.97073170732 201% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 873.0 965.302439024 90% => OK
No of words: 162.0 196.424390244 82% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.38888888889 4.92477711251 109% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.56762134501 3.73543355544 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.93376171166 2.65546596893 110% => OK
Unique words: 90.0 106.607317073 84% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.555555555556 0.547539520022 101% => OK
syllable_count: 256.5 283.868780488 90% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.45097560976 110% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 1.53170731707 131% => OK
Article: 2.0 4.33902439024 46% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 1.07073170732 93% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.482926829268 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 3.36585365854 59% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 7.0 8.94146341463 78% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 23.0 22.4926829268 102% => OK
Sentence length SD: 33.941125497 43.030603864 79% => OK
Chars per sentence: 124.714285714 112.824112599 111% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.1428571429 22.9334400587 101% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.42857142857 5.23603664747 85% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 3.83414634146 130% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 1.0 1.69756097561 59% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 3.70975609756 162% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 1.13902439024 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.09268292683 24% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.227342288646 0.215688989381 105% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.125417385197 0.103423049105 121% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0772606554861 0.0843802449381 92% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.15518585941 0.15604864568 99% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0610545315341 0.0819641961636 74% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.5 13.2329268293 117% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 48.13 61.2550243902 79% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.51609756098 135% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 10.3012195122 119% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.28 11.4140731707 125% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.77 8.06136585366 109% => OK
difficult_words: 41.0 40.7170731707 101% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 11.4329268293 101% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.9970731707 102% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.0658536585 108% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Maximum four paragraphs wanted.

Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.