In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing.
What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?
The march of time causes the obesity rate increases in some countries; as a result, people's well-being are deteriorating. There are many contributions to this problem including eating more fast foods, and doing less exercise. In what follows, these reasons will first discussed, and then some solutions would be delineated.
To begin with, as far as people are busier than before, they tend to eat unhealthy foods like fast foods because these kinds of foods are prepared faster; hence, people do not have to spend lots of time cooking a meal; however, these foods have great amount of calories that cause people become fat. Besides, as far as great amount of oil is used to cook these foods, they are delicious; consequently, people eat more foods during a meal. After considering these facts, it is obvious why many believe that growth of consuming fast foods is the primary reason for people become overweight.
In addition, the upward march of technology causes that people can do many activities through the internet; therefore, people do not have to move or walk, so they consume less calories. It helps to think of business men. They do most of their bank transactions through the web; hence, they do not walk to bank. Furthermore, as people become busy, they do not have enough time to exercise regularly; hence, it is clear that their general health and fitness become worsen.
In order to tackle these problems, governments should make some slogans that come to people's minds easily when they want to choose what to eat, and avoid eating fast foods as a result. Also, companies and schools should consider a time for doing exercises for all of their staffs and students in their timetables in order to increase their employees' and students' health.
To sum up, the primary reason for growth of obesity rate and decline of people's well-being is fast foods. Governments should make people aware of the effects of eating them, and people should pay more attention to what they eat as well. A regular exercise seems necessary to increase people's health and fitness, and people should consider a time for it in their routine life.
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and people should consider a time for it in their routine life.
Description: 'it' refers to what? Be sensitive to use 'it'.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 7.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
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No. of Words: 362 350
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No. of Different Words: 175 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.362 4.7
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No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 50 40
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Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
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Sentence Length SD: 10.346 7.5
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Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.36 0.35
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Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.099 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5