Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sport facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Health and sport are related each other. Some people believe that public health will increase when the number of sport facilities are also increasing. Another perspective, that it would have no significant effect for public health. Both views will be described in the following paragraph.
Increasing of sport facilities will give alot of easiness for society to access it. Provision of public sport facilities near of settlements would make people who are lazy to have sport are moved to do it. Workers, who are working until afternoon, will think many times to have sport when the sport facilities are limited and far from their residences. Children are interesting to sport while their environtment supports them to do that activities. The mothers that are to busy with their family will easy doing sport and control their children at once because of the sport facilites are near and simple to catch it.
On the other side, number of sport facilities are not guarante the people doing sport. People must realize that sport is important for their health. Beside that, information about how to do sport on the right way is also substansial. Increasing of sport facilities also shoud be followed by low cost of access. However, socialization about sport for health for society on various background of education should be done. So, increasing health of society by improving sport facilities could be success.
In conclusion, I strongly agree that improving number of sport facilities is needed. But public awareness about health by doing sport is more important. Both of them are related to each other.
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Health and sport are related each other.
Health and sport are related to each other.
when the number of sport facilities are also increasing.
when the number ...is also increasing.
will be described in the following paragraph.
will be described in the following paragraphs.
will give a lot of easiness for society to access it.
Description: 'it' refers to what?
The mothers that are to busy with their family will easy doing sport
The mothers who are busy with their family will be easy doing sports
because of the sport facilites are near and simple to catch it.
because the sport facilites are near and simple to catch.
number of sport facilities are not guarante
number of sport facilities do not guarantee
could be success.
could be successful.
Sentence: Increasing of sport facilities will give alot of easiness for society to access it.
Error: alot Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: Children are interesting to sport while their environtment supports them to do that activities.
Error: environtment Suggestion: environment
Sentence: The mothers that are to busy with their family will easy doing sport and control their children at once because of the sport facilites are near and simple to catch it.
Error: facilites Suggestion: facilities
Sentence: On the other side, number of sport facilities are not guarante the people doing sport.
Error: guarante Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: Beside that, information about how to do sport on the right way is also substansial.
Error: substansial Suggestion: substantial
Sentence: Increasing of sport facilities also shoud be followed by low cost of access.
Error: shoud Suggestion: should
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 8 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 6 2
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.5 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 8 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 6 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 263 350
No. of Characters: 1311 1500
No. of Different Words: 129 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.027 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.985 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.566 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 87 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 61 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 44 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 36 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 14.611 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.804 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.444 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.385 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.54 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.133 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5