What do you feel will be most popular career choices for young people in your country in the next five years? Explain your answer with examples.
One of benchmark from individuals succes is their career. There are a lot of inhabitants in my country particularly build their career from young age. They apply a job in a great company to get succes in their career. Specifically, there are several popular career in my country will be choosen in the next five years. Those are soctors of Economic, diplomacy, and environmental.
My country, Indonesia will toward ASEAN Community next year. It does mean economic growth of Indonesia is depend on ASEAN Countries stability. Therefore, almost all universities in Indonesia use ASEAN Economic system to teach their students. Because of that economic sector will be populer career when those students graduated from their college. While diplomacy sector is also important to make stability across Association of South East Asia Nation countries. Recently, Indonesian president, Mr. Susilo Bambang Yudhoyono, pay more attention for Indonesian diplomacy among 10 countries in south east Asia. He will do remuneration for citizen who work on international relation sector. That policy would increase people interest to take a job for diplomacy.
On the other side, climate change and environmental crime in my country are affect nature's activists to hire more staff and pay them with high sallary. Predictably, global warming will more terrible next year and further year. That condition would lead to increasing environmental concern in every companies and institution. Further more, environmental sector will be popular career for next few years later.
After analize Indonesian condition among three popular career above, I believe that diplomacy will be most popular career for next several years. I tend to be convinced that diplomacy theory would causes all sectors and influence the career in the future. According to the theory, Indonesian Inhabitants probably would concern to learn international relations and looking for job in relation to diplomacy. So, it will be most popular career.
To sum in the nutshell, in my country, Indonesia, would have three popular career such as sector of economic, diplomacy, and environmental. Those sectors will become popular because of either Indonesian conditions or international agreement between My country and ASEAN countries. From three sectors, only diplomacy sector can lead all popular career. So diplomacy will be most popular career in next five year in Indonesia.
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| 2014-08-14 | Fadlanmuzakki | 75 | view |
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There are a lot of inhabitants in my country particularly build their career from young age.
There are a lot of inhabitants in my country particularly building their career from young age.
There are a lot of inhabitants in my country who particularly build their career from young age.
there are several popular career in my country will be choosen in the next five years.
there are several popular careers in my country which will be chosen in the next five years.
Indonesia will toward ASEAN Community next year.
Indonesia will be toward to ASEAN Community next year.
It does mean economic growth of Indonesia is depend on ASEAN Countries stability.
It does mean that economic growth of Indonesia is depending on ASEAN Countries' stability.
remuneration for citizen who work on international relation sector.
remuneration for citizens who work on international relation sectors.
That policy would increase people interest to take a job for diplomacy.
That policy would increase people's interest to take a job for diplomacy.
are affect nature's activists
are affecting nature's activists
global warming will more terrible
global warming will be more terrible
will be most popular career
will be the most popular career
diplomacy theory would causes all sectors
diplomacy theory would cause all sectors
So, it will be most popular career.
So, it will be the most popular career.
So diplomacy will be most popular career
So diplomacy will be the most popular career
Sentence: One of benchmark from individuals succes is their career.
Error: succes Suggestion: success
Sentence: They apply a job in a great company to get succes in their career.
Error: succes Suggestion: success
Sentence: Specifically, there are several popular career in my country will be choosen in the next five years.
Error: choosen Suggestion: chosen
Sentence: Those are soctors of Economic, diplomacy, and environmental.
Error: soctors Suggestion: sectors
Sentence: Because of that economic sector will be populer career when those students graduated from their college.
Error: populer Suggestion: popular
Sentence: On the other side, climate change and environmental crime in my country are affect nature's activists to hire more staff and pay them with high sallary.
Error: sallary Suggestion: salary
Sentence: After analize Indonesian condition among three popular career above, I believe that diplomacy will be most popular career for next several years.
Error: analize Suggestion: No alternate word
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 12 2
Read a good grammar book.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 12 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2
No. of Sentences: 25 15
No. of Words: 374 350
No. of Characters: 1996 1500
No. of Different Words: 185 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.398 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.337 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.782 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 159 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 119 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 79 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 63 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 14.96 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 4.796 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.2 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.328 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.512 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.123 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5