Nowadays, being a prominent personality is desirable to many people. Although there are undeniable advantages of being famous, I believe that it begets more challenges than benefits.
Arguably, people can substantially benefit once they have achieved stardom. As far as financial rewards are concerned, it is obvious that celebrities are able to earn a great deal of money. Their sources of income are not limited to their professions as, for example, actors, singers or athletes, but also endorsement for products and brands thanks to their influence on people who are targeted customers. In addition, having reputation allows them to be respected by the public. Apparently, celebrities have talents in certain areas such as music, art or sport which fascinate a large number of people. It means that they can receive admiration and recognition from them. This, for some individuals, creates a sense of satisfaction.
Despite the upsides, I still maintain my position that being a star is more likely to be associated with troubles rather than pleasure. It is because in order to retain their stardom, celebrities have to give up their privacy, health and wellbeing. Firstly, constant appearance in the media could mean letting their personal life be publicly discussed or even criticized on newspapers, magazines and social media. This can be intrusive since they are regularly followed by paparazzi whose attempt is to make a good headline and attract more viewers. More importantly, they are likely to be relentlessly pressured to work in order to keep gaining their coverage in the media. This can result in physical and mental exhaustion. An painful example is Avicii, a well-known musician adored by millions of people and a billionaire living a fancy life, yet he decided to take his own life after a long time suffering from severe kidney damages and depression as a result of endless touring all over the world in several years. Clearly, in this situation, financial satisfaction and adoration of others cannot offset the cost of being famous.
In conclusion, being a celebrity could allows people to build great wealth to live a comfortable life and give them the pleasure for being widely admired. However, it seems to me that the pressure is rather unbearable since they have to sacrifice their private life, health and wellbeing in exchange for fame.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 579, Rule ID: LARGE_NUMBER_OF[1]
Message: Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use 'many' or 'numerous'
Suggestion: many; numerous
... as music, art or sport which fascinate a large number of people. It means that they can receive ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 727, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'A' instead of 'An' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
Suggestion: A
...sult in physical and mental exhaustion. An painful example is Avicii, a well-known...
^^
Line 7, column 40, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'could' requires the base form of the verb: 'allow'
Suggestion: allow
... In conclusion, being a celebrity could allows people to build great wealth to live a ...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, apparently, but, first, firstly, however, if, so, still, well, for example, in addition, in conclusion, such as, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 25.0 13.1623246493 190% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 7.85571142285 89% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 10.4138276553 154% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 7.30460921844 110% => OK
Pronoun: 35.0 24.0651302605 145% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 51.0 41.998997996 121% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 8.3376753507 156% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1991.0 1615.20841683 123% => OK
No of words: 383.0 315.596192385 121% => OK
Chars per words: 5.19843342037 5.12529762239 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.42384287591 4.20363070211 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.83548269201 2.80592935109 101% => OK
Unique words: 232.0 176.041082164 132% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.605744125326 0.561755894193 108% => OK
syllable_count: 633.6 506.74238477 125% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.60771543086 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 5.43587174349 184% => OK
Article: 2.0 2.52805611222 79% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.10420841683 95% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 0.809619238477 247% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.76152304609 84% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 16.0721442886 118% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.2975951904 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 57.0355868888 49.4020404114 115% => OK
Chars per sentence: 104.789473684 106.682146367 98% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.1578947368 20.7667163134 97% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.84210526316 7.06120827912 97% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.01903807615 60% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 8.67935871743 173% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.9879759519 75% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.4128256513 29% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.214236014149 0.244688304435 88% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.06459534997 0.084324248473 77% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0517440173497 0.0667982634062 77% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.134422137432 0.151304729494 89% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0441986848373 0.056905535591 78% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.1 13.0946893788 100% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 42.72 50.2224549098 85% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 11.3001002004 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.88 12.4159519038 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.7 8.58950901804 113% => OK
difficult_words: 123.0 78.4519038076 157% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 9.78957915832 87% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.1190380762 99% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.7795591182 121% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 89.8876404494 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 8.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.