Celebrities make a very good living out of media attention and have chosen to live in the public spotlight. They have no right to complain when they feel the media are intruding on their privacy.To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Essay topics:

Celebrities make a very good living out of media attention and have chosen to live in the public spotlight. They have no right to complain when they feel the media are intruding on their privacy.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Submitted by wegawisnu on Mon, 09/16/2019 - 11:31

There is a perception that famous people’s life is always in the center of attention. Consequently, when their privacy illustrated on the main pages of the magazines and newspapers they cannot complain. This essay alleges that any person has the right to private life due to a few reasons. However, there is a positive side to be well-known.

Privacy of each person must be inviolable and must be protected by law. It is not the private desire of every celebrity to be famous and their ability is just a gift. Many sports celebrities’ initial goal was to represent their own country in the world sports arena and they had not imagined that the price of their dream would be their own privacy. A few years ago, a famous footballer, Lionel Messi was recognized on the resort despite the fact that he worn big glasses and he immediately left the place. Later he explained that action by saying that he just had wanted to protect own privacy.

On the other hand, the aim of many singers and movie stars is to earn money and they consider their position as a job and would like to keep own privacy. However, they should expect before that the price of to be a celebrity is lose privacy and they do not complain. Moreover, their current position is a source of extra income because it is an opportunity to represent many famous companies. For example, a famous Kazakhstan singer, Dimash, who won a Singer Asian Festival in 2018, always wears in the same style of clothes from one company and it should be extra income for him.

In conclusion, I strongly believe that every person, even celebrities must have the right to privacy. However, a well-known is an extra source of income and instead of complaining, they should use their position to improve own financial status.

Votes
Average: 5.6 (1 vote)
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IELTS Writing Task II - IELTS Academic

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 259, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'sports'' or 'sport's'?
Suggestion: sports'; sport's
...epresent their own country in the world sports arena and they had not imagined that th...
^^^^^^
Line 9, column 229, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'lost'.
Suggestion: lost
... that the price of to be a celebrity is lose privacy and they do not complain. Moreo...
^^^^
Line 13, column 112, Rule ID: DT_JJ_NO_NOUN[2]
Message: Probably a noun is missing in this part of the sentence.
...ust have the right to privacy. However, a well-known is an extra source of income and instea...
^^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
consequently, however, if, moreover, so, well, as to, for example, in conclusion, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 13.1623246493 144% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 7.85571142285 115% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 10.4138276553 106% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 7.30460921844 137% => OK
Pronoun: 32.0 24.0651302605 133% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 37.0 41.998997996 88% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.3376753507 60% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1481.0 1615.20841683 92% => OK
No of words: 311.0 315.596192385 99% => OK
Chars per words: 4.76205787781 5.12529762239 93% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.19942759058 4.20363070211 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.6662018012 2.80592935109 95% => OK
Unique words: 160.0 176.041082164 91% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.514469453376 0.561755894193 92% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 468.0 506.74238477 92% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.60771543086 93% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 5.43587174349 110% => OK
Article: 5.0 2.52805611222 198% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.10420841683 48% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.76152304609 42% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 16.0721442886 93% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.2975951904 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 39.258912647 49.4020404114 79% => OK
Chars per sentence: 98.7333333333 106.682146367 93% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.7333333333 20.7667163134 100% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.6 7.06120827912 93% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.01903807615 60% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.67935871743 127% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.9879759519 50% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 3.4128256513 59% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.148072443605 0.244688304435 61% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0539629386736 0.084324248473 64% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0542194447633 0.0667982634062 81% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0996609005337 0.151304729494 66% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0207627861233 0.056905535591 36% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.4 13.0946893788 87% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 50.2224549098 119% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.44779559118 42% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 11.3001002004 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.33 12.4159519038 83% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.93 8.58950901804 92% => OK
difficult_words: 65.0 78.4519038076 83% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 9.78957915832 72% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.1190380762 99% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.7795591182 93% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 56.1797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.