International entertainers including sports personalities often get paid millions of dollars in one year In your view with widespread pverty in the world are these huge earnings justified You should write at least 250 words You should spend about 40 minut

Essay topics:

International entertainers, including sports personalities, often get paid millions of dollars in one year.
In your view, with widespread pverty in the world, are these huge earnings justified?

You should write at least 250 words.
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
You should give reasons for your answer using your own ideas and experience.

For most of societies, wealth people are always the “eye-catchers” for public. With the increasing gap between rich and poor, people doubt that whether it is reasonable that wealthy such as movie stars or sports athletes receive huge income. Although it seems imbalance when comparing with residents under poverty, I personally agree that they are justified to have a high earning than others.

Firstly, such huge incomes are legal for them to receive. Although it seems relatively easy that after singers simply singing some songs or soccer stars just showing their skills on playgrounds, they can earn a huge amount of money, they do put correspond efforts behind the stage. Moreover, personalities who have huge salaries pay higher pay higher tax to their social welfare and their superannuation based on the requirements from several related specifications, which suggested that those funds are legally supported by government.

Secondly, the number of income is determined by market. As beneficiaries from entertainment or sports industries, which could have large flows of funds monthly, I is certainly reasonable for them to take advantages from those fields they are working in. moreover, the present of famous people can motivate and catalyst sales of the products they are representing, or simply the sales of their albums or movies. As a result, with such enormous benefits they creative, receiving huge returns are fairly expected.

Although it is true that there are numerous of people live under poverty, this issue is less linked with those wealthy but much more related to the environment they live in. For instance, some researchers found that there are common qualities on successful people, such as insistence, hardworking and self-control. However, those valuable personal qualities are less likely to be seen in slums. In other words, without a good background to grow up, such as family and schools, it is hard for an individual to become millionaire and keep their money for the whole life. Even if they own large amount of money from donations, they may eventually lose them in gambling or drugs.

As a conclusion, the issue of poverty is more or less complicated. However, it is true that famous people deservers the assets they own. In my opinion, it is much more helpful to learn from the success stories from tem than just complaining the unfair environments we were born with.

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2015-10-05 AiringDC 57 view
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Comments

Although it seems imbalance
Although imbalance seems true

I is certainly reasonable
It is certainly reasonable

there are numerous of people live under poverty,
there are numerous of people who live under poverty,
there are numerous of people living under poverty,

people deservers the assets they own.
people deserve the assets they own.

Sentence: As a result, with such enormous benefits they creative, receiving huge returns are fairly expected.
Description: The fragment fairly expected . is not usually preceded by are
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace are with is
Description: A pronoun, personal, nominative, not 3rd person singular is not usually followed by an adjective
Suggestion: Refer to they and creative

Sentence: However, it is true that famous people deservers the assets they own.
Error: deservers Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: In my opinion, it is much more helpful to learn from the success stories from tem than just complaining the unfair environments we were born with.
Error: tem Suggestion: No alternate word

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 2 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 391 350
No. of Characters: 1964 1500
No. of Different Words: 218 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.447 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.023 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.675 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 139 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 99 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 66 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 46 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 12.405 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.824 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.284 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.536 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.07 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5