Only people who earn a lot of money are succefulDo you agree or disagree?

Essay topics:

Only people who earn a lot of money are succeful
Do you agree or disagree?

Model Answer:
I think that the question whether money is the main indicator of people's success is a controversial one. Some people believe that only one who earns a lot of money is successful. However, other people think one who does not earn a lot of money can be successful too. For several reasons, which I will list bellow, I agree with those people who think that money is an indicator of success.

First of all, if a person earns a lot of money it means he or she has unique knowledge and experience and people want to pay for these. For example, a good lawyer is often paid a very high salary, because he or she has won many cases and people are ready to pay big money for his knowledge.

A second example is that a salary of a surgeon simplicity depends on his experience and knowledge and on how many surgeries he has completed successfully. In this case surgeon's salary simplicity depends on surgeon's success. Secondly, a high salary is an indicator of a prosperous career and profession. People change their jobs, move from one place to another looking for a more interesting and better-paid job. Of cause, some people do not care about salary as long as they like their job, but from my everyday experience and observation, I can state that the majority of people who are not satisfied with their revenue would exchange their current job for another one with a higher salary.

Finally, money plays, maybe, unfortunately, an essential role in our modern life. So, people who earn a lot of money by working hard are considered to be successful. Maybe it sounds a little mercenary but I think that success must be encouraged financially otherwise it is not a success.

(Approximately 302 words)

Votes
Average: 6.1 (1 vote)
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Essays by user geethisha :

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 14, Rule ID: WHETHER[5]
Message: Can you shorten this phrase to just 'whether', or rephrase the sentence to avoid "the question"?
Suggestion: whether
Model Answer: I think that the question whether money is the main indicator of peoples ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 207, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'surgeons'' or 'surgeon's'?
Suggestion: surgeons'; surgeon's
...e surgeons salary simplicity depends on surgeons success. Secondly, a high salary is an ...
^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 413, Rule ID: OF_CAUSE[1]
Message: Did you mean 'of course' (=naturally)?
Suggestion: Of course
...a more interesting and better-paid job. Of cause, some people do not care about salary a...
^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, finally, first, however, if, look, may, second, secondly, so, for example, i think, first of all

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 13.1623246493 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 7.85571142285 64% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 10.4138276553 115% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 7.30460921844 164% => OK
Pronoun: 31.0 24.0651302605 129% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 28.0 41.998997996 67% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.3376753507 60% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1415.0 1615.20841683 88% => OK
No of words: 301.0 315.596192385 95% => OK
Chars per words: 4.70099667774 5.12529762239 92% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.16525528304 4.20363070211 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.7189803941 2.80592935109 97% => OK
Unique words: 162.0 176.041082164 92% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.538205980066 0.561755894193 96% => OK
syllable_count: 459.0 506.74238477 91% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.60771543086 93% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 5.43587174349 55% => OK
Article: 4.0 2.52805611222 158% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.10420841683 95% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 0.809619238477 124% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.76152304609 42% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 16.0721442886 93% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.2975951904 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 56.0552901657 49.4020404114 113% => OK
Chars per sentence: 94.3333333333 106.682146367 88% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.0666666667 20.7667163134 97% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.73333333333 7.06120827912 95% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.38176352705 114% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.01903807615 60% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.67935871743 127% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.9879759519 75% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.4128256513 29% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.295060790086 0.244688304435 121% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.114987639567 0.084324248473 136% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.130215564308 0.0667982634062 195% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.153715708206 0.151304729494 102% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.129212293076 0.056905535591 227% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.7 13.0946893788 82% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 50.2224549098 119% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 11.3001002004 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.98 12.4159519038 80% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.46 8.58950901804 87% => OK
difficult_words: 54.0 78.4519038076 69% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 9.78957915832 107% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.1190380762 99% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.7795591182 93% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 61.797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.