Personal information of many individuals is held by large internet companies and organisations Do you think the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages

Essay topics:

Personal information of many individuals is held by large internet companies and organisations. Do you think the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Many people, nowadays, share their private information by the internet. As a result, many of these information is kept by organizations who give internet services to the individuals. I believe the positive aspects of this issue outweigh its drawbacks which is going to be discussed below.
Cyberspace has been widely used for decades by citizens all over the world to share their personal data with their distant family members or colleagues in other part of the world. To organize the huge amount of data being transfered all over the world, there has to be a reliable organization that can gather, restore, and transfer information without any interruptions or erros. This can be considered positive if only the organizations who are in charge of keeping these information would be able to save people’s private data safely and help them in the case of facing cybercrime or being a victim of miusing their information. But what if the internet companies would not be able to control the information fully or people cannot trust the organizations properly?
This is the time when we can see the negative aspect of this issue. There might be different hurdles in the way of protecting people’s information by organizations. That is to say, what will happen if someone will hack the organization’s security panel and can access all information at once? Be it a bad luck for the organization or their own beneficial tactics to gain political or important data, people, who have been the victims, suffer the most by this mistrust.
To conclude, if only the internet organizations would be able to preserve the information of anykind and maintain this ability for a long time, the advantages of this issue would outweigh its drawbacks.

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Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 94, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this information' or 'these informations'?
Suggestion: this information; these informations
...n by the internet. As a result, many of these information is kept by organizations who give inter...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 468, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this information' or 'these informations'?
Suggestion: this information; these informations
...anizations who are in charge of keeping these information would be able to save people’s private ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, if, so, as to, as a result, that is to say

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 13.1623246493 129% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 7.85571142285 153% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 10.4138276553 106% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 7.30460921844 96% => OK
Pronoun: 22.0 24.0651302605 91% => OK
Preposition: 37.0 41.998997996 88% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 8.3376753507 132% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1453.0 1615.20841683 90% => OK
No of words: 288.0 315.596192385 91% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.04513888889 5.12529762239 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.11953428781 4.20363070211 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.99584774053 2.80592935109 107% => OK
Unique words: 157.0 176.041082164 89% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.545138888889 0.561755894193 97% => OK
syllable_count: 466.2 506.74238477 92% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 5.43587174349 74% => OK
Article: 1.0 2.52805611222 40% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.10420841683 95% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 0.809619238477 247% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 2.0 4.76152304609 42% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 12.0 16.0721442886 75% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 24.0 20.2975951904 118% => OK
Sentence length SD: 55.2093867824 49.4020404114 112% => OK
Chars per sentence: 121.083333333 106.682146367 113% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.0 20.7667163134 116% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.91666666667 7.06120827912 55% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.01903807615 40% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.67935871743 92% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.9879759519 50% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 3.4128256513 59% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.160887887966 0.244688304435 66% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0744281659714 0.084324248473 88% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0494276670699 0.0667982634062 74% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.126792958826 0.151304729494 84% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0522172986637 0.056905535591 92% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.4 13.0946893788 110% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 50.2224549098 94% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.44779559118 150% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 11.3001002004 112% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.31 12.4159519038 99% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.56 8.58950901804 100% => OK
difficult_words: 68.0 78.4519038076 87% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 9.78957915832 112% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 10.1190380762 115% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.7795591182 111% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.