The role of education is to prepare children for the modern world. Schools should cut art and music out of the curriculum so that children can focus on useful subjects such as information technology. To what extend do yo agree or disagree?
People hold differing views about the important of education for children. While some people think it is better if schools should cut some subjects, such as art and music out of the curriculum to help children have more time to focus on useful subjects namely information technology, I agree with those who argue that these subjects should be taught like extra curriculum.
On the one hand, there are some factors why people think some subjects namely art and music could have a negative impact on the preparing for education of children. Firstly, these subjects would not have any value when children prepare to do the lasted test to graduate their high schools. Evidently, this test only contains the compulsory subjects namely maths, physics, chemistry, etc. Furthermore, when children have to study art and music, it consume a greater amount of time instead of they could spent this time for some useful subjects such as information technology.
On the other hand, I support the view that it is unnecessary to cut out music and art from the study programs. To begin with, these subjects are extremely important for the creation developing of kids. In particular, when children have to study mandatory subjects which was considered dry, there is a strongly possibility that might retricts the emotion, mood and even the creation of children. Furthermore, music and art are vital major that could help children feel more interested and comfortable due to the fact that they can sing, draw by the way they want.
In conclusion, while other people believe the the importance of act and music subjects is not exist and might want to cut out all of them, I believe these subjects also have some advantages for kids.
Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
---|---|---|---|
2021-09-29 | IELTS learner from VIETNAM | 61 | view |
2021-09-29 | IELTS learner from VIETNAM | 56 | view |
2021-04-20 | EgorEnglish | 78 | view |
2019-10-20 | Nishitaaaa | 78 | view |
2019-07-26 | Lê Thị Diệu Linh | 11 | view |
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 448, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'consumes'?
Suggestion: consumes
...hildren have to study art and music, it consume a greater amount of time instead of the...
^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 503, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'could' requires the base form of the verb: 'spend'
Suggestion: spend
...er amount of time instead of they could spent this time for some useful subjects such...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 301, Rule ID: A_RB_NN[1]
Message: You used an adverb ('strongly') instead an adjective, or a noun ('possibility') instead of another adjective.
...ects which was considered dry, there is a strongly possibility that might retricts the emotion, mood a...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 44, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: the
... conclusion, while other people believe the the importance of act and music subjects is...
^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 44, Rule ID: DT_DT[1]
Message: Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only 'the' or 'the' is left.
Suggestion: the; the
... conclusion, while other people believe the the importance of act and music subjects is...
^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 96, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'existed'.
Suggestion: existed
...rtance of act and music subjects is not exist and might want to cut out all of them, ...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, firstly, furthermore, if, so, while, in conclusion, in particular, such as, by the way, to begin with, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 13.1623246493 68% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 7.85571142285 115% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 10.4138276553 86% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 7.30460921844 137% => OK
Pronoun: 23.0 24.0651302605 96% => OK
Preposition: 33.0 41.998997996 79% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.3376753507 96% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1435.0 1615.20841683 89% => OK
No of words: 288.0 315.596192385 91% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.98263888889 5.12529762239 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.11953428781 4.20363070211 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.56309039796 2.80592935109 91% => OK
Unique words: 148.0 176.041082164 84% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.513888888889 0.561755894193 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 441.9 506.74238477 87% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.60771543086 93% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 5.43587174349 129% => OK
Article: 0.0 2.52805611222 0% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.10420841683 190% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.76152304609 105% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 11.0 16.0721442886 68% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 26.0 20.2975951904 128% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 61.6358272972 49.4020404114 125% => OK
Chars per sentence: 130.454545455 106.682146367 122% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.1818181818 20.7667163134 126% => OK
Discourse Markers: 12.0909090909 7.06120827912 171% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.01903807615 120% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.67935871743 92% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.9879759519 50% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.4128256513 29% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.3673064461 0.244688304435 150% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.140382031537 0.084324248473 166% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.081253567905 0.0667982634062 122% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.233038768062 0.151304729494 154% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0951860787283 0.056905535591 167% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.1 13.0946893788 115% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 53.55 50.2224549098 107% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 11.3001002004 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.9 12.4159519038 96% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.61 8.58950901804 89% => OK
difficult_words: 49.0 78.4519038076 62% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 9.78957915832 143% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 10.1190380762 123% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.7795591182 111% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 61.797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.