Some people argue that too much attention and too many resources are given to the protection of wild animals and birds To what extent do you agree or disagree

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Some people argue that too much attention and too many resources are given to the protection of wild animals and birds. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It has been a debatable topic that whether people should invest more money and resources in animal conservation today. Some suggest that the expenditure and resources should be spent on human society and to solve social problems. In my point of view, the investment in wildlife protection will always be worthwhile. The reasons are as follows.

Animal species have been vanishing at a much faster rate for about a century now due to human factors such as pollution, commercial overexploitation, poaching and deforestation. It doesn't matter that an animal is ugly to look at, undesirable or poten...

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2018-01-05 Jessie719 78 view

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Animal species have been vanishing at a much faster rate for about a century now due to human factors
Animal species have been vanishing at a much faster rate for about a century due to human's activities

there are millions individuals spend billions of dollars a year to practice "nature" activities
there are millions individuals who spend billions of dollars a year to practice "nature" activities
there are millions individuals spending billions of dollars a year to practice "nature" activities

There's also the tourism industry, which attracts many travelers thanks to the beauty of its forests, the splendor of its mountains and the majesty of its lakes and rivers.
Description: 'its' refers to what? Be sensitive to use 'its', 'it'.

will have the opportunity to enjoy nature in all its glory.
Description: what is the subject for this sentence? can you re-write this sentence?

Sentence: In conclude, we must step up efforts to conserve animals and birds not only to keep the ecological balance but also to ensure that our grandchildren, like ourselves, will have the opportunity to enjoy nature in all its glory.
Description: A preposition is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to In and conclude

Sentence: Animal species have been vanishing at a much faster rate for about a century now due to human factors such as pollution, commercial overexploitation, poaching and deforestation.
Error: overexploitation Suggestion: over exploitation

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2

Don't use 'not only...but also...' a lot of times in one essay. One time is enough. You may use 'neither...nor...','either..or','both..and..'

Seems like you have serious grammar issues. Read a good grammar book and pay attention to sentence structure. You may read this one: http://testbig.com/question/grammar

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 351 350
No. of Characters: 1772 1500
No. of Different Words: 203 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.328 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.048 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.92 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 138 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 102 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 68 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 49 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.938 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.105 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.625 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.289 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.556 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.101 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5