Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both these views and give y

There are others who think that in order to greatly improve the health of the citizens is to provide an increase in the quantity of sports venues while there are some, myself included, who believe that this will only have a minimal outcome compared to other ways such as providing medical missions, seminars that increases awareness in infectious diseases, and other existing health programs.

People nowadays are becoming conscious about their health especially about their figures and because of this more and more individuals enroll themselves in gym classes, Pilates etc, under trained instructors in order to achieve their set goals of either slimming or gaining extra weight. But not all can afford to enroll on these kinds of activities and for that reason increasing the number of sports facilities open to public will immensely improve the health of the citizens. An example of these are basketball courts, tennis courts built in every community which can also be a venue for public zumba classes, a type of dance exercise. Also public treadmills in park and other equipment like those seen in Japan will have an effect on the health of the people.

However, others argue that it will only have a minimal effect to the community because other focus areas are more important compared to sports facilities. Not all are willing to use these venues due to factors such as age, gender and will to exercise in public. Creating awareness in existing programs like family planning expanded program on immunizations is considered to be more significant. Holding free seminars about infectious diseases like tuberculosis, HIV etc will prevent the public from acquiring such diseases. Providing medical missions to the citizens will also help in improving the well being of the community.

To my mind, sports facilities, have an impact to the well being of the people but it only has a minimal impact compared to other focus areas mentioned. Exercise is important but other key areas are much more significant to achieve the millennium development goals of the country.

To end, sports help tone one's body but it is just one of the factors to greatly develop the health of the community. Other programs have more significant impact to one's health.

Votes
Average: 6.7 (1 vote)

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 536, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ese are basketball courts, tennis courts built in every community which can also ...
^^
Line 3, column 641, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...umba classes, a type of dance exercise. Also public treadmills in park and other equ...
^^^^
Line 5, column 137, Rule ID: TO_NON_BASE[1]
Message: The verb after "to" should be in the base form: 'sport'.
Suggestion: sport
...us areas are more important compared to sports facilities. Not all are willing to use ...
^^^^^^
Line 9, column 26, Rule ID: ONES[1]
Message: Did you mean 'one's'?
Suggestion: one's
...he country. To end, sports help tone ones body but it is just one of the factors ...
^^^^
Line 9, column 165, Rule ID: ONES[1]
Message: Did you mean 'one's'?
Suggestion: one's
...rograms have more significant impact to ones health.
^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, however, if, so, well, while, such as

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 13.1623246493 114% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 7.85571142285 115% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 10.4138276553 106% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 7.30460921844 110% => OK
Pronoun: 20.0 24.0651302605 83% => OK
Preposition: 57.0 41.998997996 136% => OK
Nominalization: 2.0 8.3376753507 24% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1891.0 1615.20841683 117% => OK
No of words: 371.0 315.596192385 118% => OK
Chars per words: 5.09703504043 5.12529762239 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.38877662729 4.20363070211 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.58614907599 2.80592935109 92% => OK
Unique words: 182.0 176.041082164 103% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.490566037736 0.561755894193 87% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 603.9 506.74238477 119% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 5.43587174349 18% => OK
Article: 2.0 2.52805611222 79% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.10420841683 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 0.809619238477 247% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.76152304609 63% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 16.0721442886 87% => OK
Sentence length: 26.0 20.2975951904 128% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 81.703452079 49.4020404114 165% => OK
Chars per sentence: 135.071428571 106.682146367 127% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.5 20.7667163134 128% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.42857142857 7.06120827912 49% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.38176352705 114% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.01903807615 100% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.67935871743 127% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.9879759519 25% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 3.4128256513 59% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.26659306541 0.244688304435 109% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0949890503948 0.084324248473 113% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.066982219191 0.0667982634062 100% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.149907460336 0.151304729494 99% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0483727255857 0.056905535591 85% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.8 13.0946893788 121% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 45.09 50.2224549098 90% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 11.3001002004 119% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.6 12.4159519038 101% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.76 8.58950901804 102% => OK
difficult_words: 90.0 78.4519038076 115% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 27.0 9.78957915832 276% => Linsear_write_formula is high.
gunning_fog: 12.4 10.1190380762 123% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.7795591182 121% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 67.4157303371 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.