Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Playing computer games is a waste of time. Children should not be allowed to play them

Essay topics:

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?

Playing computer games is a waste of time. Children should not be allowed to play them

In the past, humans could do not stay alive without water to drink, food to eat, and breathing. Nowaday; in addition to them, we can not survive without the internet and computer devices. Some people believe computer games are necessary for kids and improve their smartness capabilities. In contrary, others disagree, they think those electronic devices brings a lot of danger for those children. As far as I am concerned, I agree with the second position. I think long and uncontrolled playing hours is unhealthy for those kids' growth; it distracts them from their education and creates an unsocial population in the future generation. Following a brief explanation of my perspective.
First of all, even though many computer games includes education learning programs, in many ways they can help our kids to learn several things such as writing letters, spelling or learning how to differentiate between colors, objects. As parents, we are unable to teach our kids those things. However, those games are like magic; it attracts everyone not only our children to spend very long hours in front of those gadgets which not weakened their eye sights, but it decreases their physical body movements. Research at the University of Ohio at 2014 states that those touch screens and mobile computer devices create 70 percent overweight kids prefer to sit, eat and watch or play those games. If we compare them with their parents' and grandparents' generation who spent hours playing, biking and jumping in the playgrounds or parks.
Second, in addition to the danger of their health, those kids become addict to those computer video games prefer to stay alone for long hours inside their housed, locked themselves away from creating new friends to play, they will miss the social childhood life and would be very timid future adults. A good example of that my cousin's son, he spent his childhood inside his room playing X-box and mobile games. Furthermore, he graduated from the high school this year and finds himself unable to interact with people or prepare himself for job interviews. All that years wasted his time with that imaginary fictional world which deprived him of the reality.
Last but not the least, kids at school age need to study and read books or do their homework on a regular base. It is very hard to find that time after school to study and play computer games. Other research from University of Michigan at 2015 asserts that many children among age 5 and 17 years old who waste long hours playing games have lower grades at school. Unfortunately, they have the lower IQ level in mathematics, physics, and chemistry. Those computers do not allow anyone to think or grasp the answer.
Based on the reasons I discussed above, I do not believe that enable kids to spend hours playing computer games is a lovely idea.
It is unhealthy for their body growth and metabolism. Perhaps, it will decrease educational school level and creates unsocial timid future population.

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Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
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2016-10-06 may82 73 view

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 450, Rule ID: EYE_BROW[1]
Message: This word is usually spelt together: 'eyesights'.
Suggestion: eyesights
... those gadgets which not weakened their eye sights, but it decreases their physical body m...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 80, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this computer' or 'those computers'?
Suggestion: this computer; those computers
...eir health, those kids become addict to those computer video games prefer to stay alone for lo...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Discourse Markers used:
['but', 'first', 'furthermore', 'however', 'if', 'second', 'so', 'i think', 'in addition', 'such as', 'first of all']

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.261732851986 0.247107183377 106% => OK
Verbs: 0.151624548736 0.155533422707 97% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0902527075812 0.0946595960268 95% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0379061371841 0.0501214627716 76% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0794223826715 0.0437548338989 182% => Less pronouns wanted. Try not to use 'you, I, they, he...' as the subject of a sentence
Prepositions: 0.102888086643 0.122226691241 84% => OK
Participles: 0.0252707581227 0.0403226058552 63% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.51738506418 2.80594681477 90% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0324909747292 0.0326793684256 99% => OK
Particles: 0.0 0.00163938923432 0% => OK
Determiners: 0.0667870036101 0.0861772015684 77% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0108303249097 0.021408717616 51% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.00902527075812 0.011925033212 76% => OK

Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2982.0 1933.35771543 154% => OK
No of words: 499.0 316.048096192 158% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.97595190381 6.12580529183 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.72634191566 4.20517956788 112% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.350701402806 0.374742101984 94% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.258517034068 0.28420135186 91% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.174348697395 0.203846283523 86% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.0941883767535 0.137316102897 69% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.51738506418 2.80594681477 90% => OK
Unique words: 269.0 176.037074148 153% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.539078156313 0.56093040696 96% => OK
Word variations: 65.521705562 60.7387585426 108% => OK
How many sentences: 24.0 16.0891783567 149% => OK
Sentence length: 20.7916666667 20.7743622355 100% => OK
Sentence length SD: 61.9815020568 49.517814964 125% => OK
Chars per sentence: 124.25 127.492653851 97% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.7916666667 20.7743622355 100% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.458333333333 0.814263465372 56% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 4.38877755511 137% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 3.99599198397 50% => OK
Readability: 46.6433700735 49.1944974215 95% => OK
Elegance: 1.44966442953 1.69124875643 86% => OK

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.324034182181 0.332605444948 97% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.0806080591721 0.102741220458 78% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0590007899588 0.0668466124924 88% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.473762679033 0.534860350844 89% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.166222845079 0.148594505496 112% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.104949219254 0.134430193775 78% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0533820255976 0.0742795772207 72% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.265703894456 0.324371583561 82% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.133019338239 0.0638462369009 208% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.188364383907 0.228012699653 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0768136452024 0.058150111329 132% => OK

Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.68436873747 115% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 3.9879759519 226% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 3.41683366733 146% => OK
Positive topic words: 9.0 5.90881763527 152% => OK
Negative topic words: 6.0 2.5751503006 233% => OK
Neutral topic words: 4.0 1.9629258517 204% => OK
Total topic words: 19.0 10.4468937876 182% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

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Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

electronic devices brings a lot of danger for those children
electronic devices bring a lot of dangers for those children

Following a brief explanation of my perspective.
Following is a brief explanation of my perspective.

many computer games includes education learning programs,
many computer games include education learning programs,

those kids become addict to those computer video games prefer to stay alone for long hours inside their housed,
those kids who become addict to those computer video games prefer to stay alone for long hours inside their housed,

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2

No. of Words: 499 350 //Less content wanted. Don't list reasons in the introduction. This will create duplicated content.

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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 7.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 24 15
No. of Words: 499 350
No. of Characters: 2422 1500
No. of Different Words: 262 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.726 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.854 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.411 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 167 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 119 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 78 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 42 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.792 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.304 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.375 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.271 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.271 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.108 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5