People should look after their health for personal benefits rather than a duty for a society To what extent do you agree or disagree

Essay topics:

People should look after their health for personal benefits, rather than a duty for a society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is argued that people should take care of themselves for their own sake rather than for social responsibility. While a good health condition of an individual can alleviate the burden of the healthcare system, I mostly agree that people caring for their health are beneficiaries who can raise their longevity and obtain more achievements in their lives.

On the one hand, people caring themselves actively can help minimize the government's cost for healthcare. Since the more people are aware of their physical condition and take care of it, the less people are likely to contract contagious diseases. Therefore, the monetary source may be allotted to address other critical social issues such as education or transportation that can enhance people's well-being. For example, during Covid-19 pandemic, there was a high spirit of preventing the transmission of Covid among Vietnamese, which partly helped to minimize the death's toll as well as infected cases. As a result, Vietnamese governments could still spend sources maintaining the economic stability, which ensured the quality of people's lives.

On the other hand, people taking care of themselves are advantageous. Chief of these is that people's lifetime lengthened. Because when people care about their state, they can detect their health problems and have measures to prevent and cure them. For example, patients who are diagnosed with cancer in its early phase by having their medical check regularly will get a higher chance of being curable. Secondly, people may attain their goals easier if they have good health. This is because healthy people are often in their best physical and mental state, which are prerequisites for efficient and strenuous work, thus, they will perform better in work and get a chance of promotion.

In conclusion, while people who are responsible for their physical condition will help to lift up the government's weight, I contend that they will be main beneficiaries due to the possibility to last their longevity and fulfill their lives. It is advisable that people should not only care about their physical state but also be aware of their mentality to improve holistic health.

Votes
Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 192, Rule ID: FEWER_LESS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'fewer'? The noun people is countable.
Suggestion: fewer
...ical condition and take care of it, the less people are likely to contract contagiou...
^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, if, may, second, secondly, so, still, then, therefore, thus, well, while, for example, in conclusion, such as, as a result, as well as, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 13.1623246493 137% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 7.85571142285 178% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 10.4138276553 96% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 7.30460921844 178% => OK
Pronoun: 37.0 24.0651302605 154% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 36.0 41.998997996 86% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.3376753507 84% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1832.0 1615.20841683 113% => OK
No of words: 348.0 315.596192385 110% => OK
Chars per words: 5.26436781609 5.12529762239 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.31911543099 4.20363070211 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.72578639681 2.80592935109 97% => OK
Unique words: 191.0 176.041082164 108% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.548850574713 0.561755894193 98% => OK
syllable_count: 564.3 506.74238477 111% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 5.43587174349 129% => OK
Article: 2.0 2.52805611222 79% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.10420841683 238% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.76152304609 105% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 16.0721442886 93% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 20.2975951904 113% => OK
Sentence length SD: 56.6249258032 49.4020404114 115% => OK
Chars per sentence: 122.133333333 106.682146367 114% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.2 20.7667163134 112% => OK
Discourse Markers: 10.9333333333 7.06120827912 155% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.01903807615 20% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.67935871743 115% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.9879759519 75% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 3.4128256513 59% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.259707143955 0.244688304435 106% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.101960019251 0.084324248473 121% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0702183376008 0.0667982634062 105% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.189779948625 0.151304729494 125% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0741658443466 0.056905535591 130% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.9 13.0946893788 114% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 48.13 50.2224549098 96% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 11.3001002004 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.52 12.4159519038 109% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.68 8.58950901804 101% => OK
difficult_words: 86.0 78.4519038076 110% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 9.78957915832 148% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.1190380762 111% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 10.7795591182 139% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.