Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Famous entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy than they have now. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
A glance at people's attitude toward celebrities brings to the light a question that has been asked several times, namely, whether famous entertainer need to have more privacy or not. Although teenagers believe that their role models like to be popular and have less privacy, I, as a close friend of a well-known artist reject this opinion that support privacy right for popular celebrities.
The foremost reason why I am supporting this idea lies in the fact that as human being, we all have same needs and rights. It does not matter whether we are famous or unknown person, we have secrets, difficult days, and embarrassing memories. For example, even Brad Pitt cries somedays and need to be alone without be watched by news reporters. Recently, Angelina Juli said that after her divorce she got a severe depression because of rumors in the news so she preferred not to come out of the house. This fact that we know them does not give us the right to annoy them whenever they in public. Therefore, it is a great suggestion to give them more privacy to feel comfortable.
Another subtle point that I should deem is the fact that ordinary life is like a dream for famous people. They cannot go to low level restaurant because people anticipate that they spend only on expensive foods while they want to bite a cheap snack from Mc Donald. If they keep themselves in their houses similar to prison, what does popularity bring for them? They can buy expensive houses, cars, and jewelries, but they are deprived from having free life. Most actors and actress are not seen in public without make-up which has a big burden on their shoulders. Thus, more privacy gives them the opportunity to live however they want.
Nevertheless, since we love our outstanding athletes, we are interested to know about their lifestyle and success. Specially young adults who want to find a successful person to imitate his behavior asserts that celebrities advises helps them to find their ways. However, this concern can be eliminated if well-known individuals hold some public gathering and meeting to answer their fans' questions. So, this opinion does not have any conflict with more privacy.
Due to the aforementioned argument explored in the previous statements, I highly recommend paparazzis to allow famous people live freely without any worry of be seen in yellow magazines. it is necessary for a society to protect all peoples' right and do not trespass private boundaries.
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- TPO 21 - Integrated TOEFL essay 89
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 187, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...y worry of be seen in yellow magazines. it is necessary for a society to protect a...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, however, if, nevertheless, so, therefore, thus, well, while, for example
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 9.8082437276 61% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 13.8261648746 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.0286738351 109% => OK
Pronoun: 54.0 43.0788530466 125% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 48.0 52.1666666667 92% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.0752688172 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2048.0 1977.66487455 104% => OK
No of words: 416.0 407.700716846 102% => OK
Chars per words: 4.92307692308 4.8611393121 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.51620172871 4.48103885553 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.59259014668 2.67179642975 97% => OK
Unique words: 253.0 212.727598566 119% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.608173076923 0.524837075471 116% => OK
syllable_count: 639.0 618.680645161 103% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.94265232975 20% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 20.6003584229 97% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 38.6051809994 48.9658058833 79% => OK
Chars per sentence: 102.4 100.406767564 102% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.8 20.6045352989 101% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.85 5.45110844103 71% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 3.85842293907 156% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.175023304837 0.236089414692 74% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0526575295383 0.076458572812 69% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0475796531289 0.0737576698707 65% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0931545244211 0.150856017488 62% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0419130595967 0.0645574589148 65% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.1 11.7677419355 103% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 58.1214874552 103% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 10.1575268817 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.26 10.9000537634 103% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.58 8.01818996416 107% => OK
difficult_words: 104.0 86.8835125448 120% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 10.002688172 135% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 90.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 27.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.