Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The most important investment that can be made to the education of children aged four to seven is giving them a computer.
No one would doubt that education is fundamental, especially to children in young age. Furthermore, technology plays an important role in education. Therefore, when it comes to whether to give children aged four to seven computers, people may have different opinions. As far as I am concerned, according to following reasons and some of my personal experiences, I disagree that the most important investment of education of children is to give them computers.
First, to educate young children, children need to spend more time with their parents, but giving children computers may distract them from get alone with family. Take Fred, my younger brother, for example, before he went to elementary school, our parents bought him a Mac, making me so envious. When Fred got his new computer, he seldom talked to my parents; instead he indulged himself in playing online games which were so cute and attracting. As a result, my parents had a hard time to teach Fred to know some basic and useful knowledge. Therefore, to avoid children to become isolated, giving them computers is not an option.
Secondly, educating young children means cultivating good habits, but having computers will develop bad habits. Take me for instance, I can recall when I was five, I always begged my parents bought me a computer. However, my parents denied my request, they thought that once I had a computer, I would start watching cartoons by online channel every day. Then, after I entranced primary school, my parents finally bought me a computer, and I did watched funny video every moments after class, just as my parents predicted.
Last but not least, young children should be taught right and wrong, but having computers may make them expose to inappropriate information. Take recent policy in our country for example, there are more and more researches which show that young children may intimate violent behaviors or sexual harassment while they watch bloody or sexy drama. In fact, there are some students bully their classmates just after they go to school. Therefore, our country announce new policy that requires parents cannot allow children to own their own electronic devices to avoid children access to improper website.
Admittedly, children can access to all kinds of knowledge via using computers, so it may seem reasonable to offer children in young ages computers. Yet, based on aforementioned analyses, I strongly doubt that giving children aged four to seven computers is the most important investment.
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there are some students bully their classmates
there are some students who bully their classmates
Sentence: First, to educate young children, children need to spend more time with their parents, but giving children computers may distract them from get alone with family.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to from and get
our country announce new policy
our country announces a new policy
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 25 in 30
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 408 350
No. of Characters: 2035 1500
No. of Different Words: 224 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.494 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.988 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.587 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 157 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 117 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 83 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 47 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.474 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.269 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.842 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.348 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.57 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.176 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5