do you agree or disagree/ In order to become financially responsible adults, children should learn to manage their own money at a young age
Childhood is a very important part in our lives. Through this stage, we learned a lot of things that related to our personalities, and our future. In this stage, we learned how to be responsible person and one thing that we have to learn is how to manage our own money. Some people would agree that it is not necessary to learn children how to manage their own money in a young age since they have concentrate on enjoyment. Others disagree. In my view, In order to become financially responsible adults, children should learn to manage their own money at a young age for two imperative reasons.
First, at young age, people would learn more effectively. In fact, this is the best age that children could absorb a lot of things that would support them in the future and they can adopt many useful things. Take my daughter as an example, she was five years old, and I taught her how distingush between her needs and her demands. When she was a kid, we went shopping and she wanted to buy colors that she already had. In fact, I persaueded her to focus on things that really and they essential for her. At first, she was not convinced about that but I explained to her how this will affect her budget positively now and in the future and she accepted the idea. Actually, she realized this would an effective way to be responsible. Now, she is studying at college and she knew how to manage her budget in the school and she happy because she had learn how to manage her money when she was young. This experience taught me that kids should learn to manage their own currency in a young age which is extremely beneficial for the future.
Second, collecting money in early age in our life will help us to have a good habit. In order to create a good behavior in children, parents should modify their children behavior in an effecient way to endorse them in the work, family, and school. For instance, my brother is spoiled and he gets money from my parents. Actually, he takes from them what he wants and he doesn't know how to collect and save money. Because of my parents, he doesn't care to plan of the future and he wastes his money by buying a lot of things. However, I learned myself to save money when I was ten years old and this provided me with extra money because I learned how to manage my own money. When I graduated from the school, I was able to open my business and then I bought a house because I managed my money effectively. As we can clearly see, shildren should take this advantage to thrive in the world.
By the way of conclusion, based on the arguments explored above, I firmly concur that children should learn to manage their own money at a young age in order to become financially responsible adults. Managing money is worthwhile and specious.
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how to be responsible person
how to be a responsible person
it is not necessary to learn children how to manage their own money
it is not necessary to teach children how to manage their own money
since they have concentrate on enjoyment.
since they have concentrated on enjoyment.
since they have concentrations on enjoyment.
and they essential for her.
and they are essential for her.
and she happy because
and she is happy because
Sentence: Take my daughter as an example, she was five years old, and I taught her how distingush between her needs and her demands.
Error: distingush Suggestion: distinguish
Sentence: In fact, I persaueded her to focus on things that really and they essential for her.
Error: persaueded Suggestion: persuaded
Sentence: In order to create a good behavior in children, parents should modify their children behavior in an effecient way to endorse them in the work, family, and school.
Error: effecient Suggestion: efficient
Sentence: As we can clearly see, shildren should take this advantage to thrive in the world.
Error: shildren Suggestion: children
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Words: 510 while No. of Different Words: 213
Don't always use pronoun like "I, she, they, he" as subject. More sentences varieties wanted.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 21 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 25 15
No. of Words: 510 350
No. of Characters: 2199 1500
No. of Different Words: 213 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.752 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.312 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.33 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 138 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 83 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 56 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 32 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.4 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.565 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.48 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.316 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.471 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.249 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5