Famous entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy than they have now.

Essay topics:

Famous entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy than they have now.

With the rapid development of media, numerous scandals are constantly reported. Here is a claim that famous entertainers and athletes are supposed to have more privacy than they have currently. In my perspective, I accede to this opinion because stars and athletes are under too much press due to the excessive media cover. But there is also some advantages of such cover, one of which is they can monitor the actions of these famous people.

To begin with, the media can concentrate too much on the self-interest, thus ignoring the privacy of entertainers or athletes. Some media companies want to improve their popularity or to gain more money, so they can conduct inappropriate behavior which can intrude stars' lives. In my point of view, these people go against the morality. Because every one wants privacy, nobody wants their privacy to be intruded. Hence, stars and athletes deserve more privacy.

Secondly, the media sometimes are prone to exaggerate the truth, which can lay negative influences on stars' reputations. Whenever some scandals of a famous person is revealed, remarkable disturbance can be made, which is definitely what some media want. But some events are falsified and are totally erroneous. If stars are given more privacy, such falsified events can be avoided.

Admittedly, there is some virtue of the media. That is they can help monitor people and make them behave appropriately. If there exist no media, some people can go away from the morality. For instance, some officials can be reduced to corruption if there is no one to monitor. Hence, the media can bear the function of keeping the society run properly and prevent people from behaving extremely.

In conclusion, famous entertainers, athletes and other public people deserve more privacy since some media intrude their privacies too much. But at the same time, the monitoring from the media should never be canceled since it can have a positive influence on people.

Votes
Average: 6.1 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 9, column 21, Rule ID: ADVERB_WORD_ORDER[4]
Message: The adverb 'sometimes' is usually put after the verb 'are'.
Suggestion: are sometimes
... more privacy. Secondly, the media sometimes are prone to exaggerate the truth, which ca...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 53, Rule ID: NON3PRS_VERB[10]
Message: The pronoun is must be used with 'are'.
Suggestion: are
...there is some virtue of the media. That is they can help monitor people and make t...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, hence, if, second, secondly, so, thus, for instance, in conclusion, to begin with

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 15.1003584229 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 9.8082437276 133% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 13.8261648746 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 6.0 11.0286738351 54% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 17.0 43.0788530466 39% => OK
Preposition: 35.0 52.1666666667 67% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1653.0 1977.66487455 84% => OK
No of words: 320.0 407.700716846 78% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.165625 4.8611393121 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.22948505376 4.48103885553 94% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.70553360899 2.67179642975 101% => OK
Unique words: 165.0 212.727598566 78% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.515625 0.524837075471 98% => OK
syllable_count: 542.7 618.680645161 88% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.51630824373 112% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 9.59856630824 31% => OK
Article: 4.0 3.08781362007 130% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 20.6003584229 97% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 20.1344086022 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 32.9051287796 48.9658058833 67% => OK
Chars per sentence: 82.65 100.406767564 82% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.0 20.6045352989 78% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.6 5.45110844103 84% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 11.8709677419 76% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 3.85842293907 181% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.229536543552 0.236089414692 97% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0802894673219 0.076458572812 105% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.146591040807 0.0737576698707 199% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.156243939836 0.150856017488 104% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.12586097642 0.0645574589148 195% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.9 11.7677419355 93% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 46.78 58.1214874552 80% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.41 10.9000537634 114% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.33 8.01818996416 104% => OK
difficult_words: 79.0 86.8835125448 91% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 10.0537634409 84% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200

Rates: 61.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.