“It is better for children to choose jobs that are similar to their parents’ jobs than to choose jobs that are very different from their parents’ job.”
It goes without saying that in such a sophisticated world where people are putting all of their efforts so as to find a suitable job guaranteeing their future life, taking the on-counter alternatives into account would be almost a rational task. Some people are inclined toward the opinion that children should find a thoroughly new job differing from their parents' whereas others hold exactly the opposite perspective. As far as I am concerned, it will be extremely profitable for children to continue their parents' careers. In the ensuing paragraphs, I will delve into the most outstanding reasons.
The first exquisite point to be mentioned is that since they spend a noticeable period of their childhood beside their parents, it is obvious that they will become familiar with their job. Therefore, they have much more time in order to adapt themselves to the job which is going to be the source of their income in future life. Moreover, it is of great possibility that they gain a host of experiences because they can help their parents in their leisure time. They can even grasp some experiences by just looking at their parents’ working. These experiences would definitely help them develop with an incredibly growing pace.
Another reason which deserves some words here is that people would get fame if they go on their ancestors’ career. To clarify, take the example of an extended family in which the father's job is identical to the grandfather's and the boy has decided to continue his father's job. People living nearby who knew the grandfather will be informed of the fact that this job has a hereditary characteristic. Hence, the great family is going to be famous for that particular job as it passes from one generation to another. It could be unfair not to mention the fact that the more fame a person gains in a specific field, the more income he would have from his niche. Consequently, it would provide him with a brilliant future.
To put it briefly, if one weighs the merits and demerits of the aforementioned statement, one soon realizes that keeping the job of parents is most likely to be a lucrative job in future. But that was the story in a nutshell. In fact, there are a multiplicity of other reasons, challenging the above statement, which could be mentioned but are not embraced due to the dearth of time.
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flaws:
1. More sentences varieties wanted. Try to use less pronouns (like 'It, I, They, We, You...') as the subject of a sentence. for example:
Moreover, it is of great possibility that
they gain a host of experiences because
they can help their parents in their leisure time.
They can even grasp some experiences by just looking at their parents’ working.
2. A lot of pattern sentences.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 21 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 401 350
No. of Characters: 1898 1500
No. of Different Words: 213 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.475 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.733 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.663 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 128 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 94 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 61 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 41 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.278 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.943 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.611 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.292 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.493 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.101 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5