Parents should reward their children they help them with household tasks. Agree or disagree?
Controversry exists over whether children should get money from their parents in turn of their helps with household tasks or not. Although some people are of the opinion that giving money as reward for children while they become involved in hosechores create strong motivation for children to be more helpful, others believe that this approach causes children to be used to geeting money even in turn of doing even negligible tasks. I should mention that I belong to latter one for some reasons.
The first aspect to point out is that children should understand their contribution have more value than money. Children do all house chores such as cleaning, shopping,and cooking while their parents are at works. When they see their parents have sense of satisfaction because of having such dutiful children, children feel relieved. They just want to see their hardworking parents’ smiles. This values more than money for them. They know that if thye take such responsibilities, their parents have more times to allocate for them so that they can talk about various issues such as their emotional or academic problems. In this case, the bond among family members will be strengthen. As you can see, the value of children’s tasks at home is more than money.
The more further point is that children should learn how to be responsible in the future. Nowadays, it is common for all children to waste their valuable times in front of either computer games ot TV programs. If they get involved in daily taks, they can make the best use of their times. For example, I can rememeber when I was a 8-year-old girl, I used to buy bread for my family. I have to make an organized plan not to fall behind my homeworks too. Helping my mother has learned me not to spend my times in front of TV, which can result in many health problem such as obesity and eye irritation. Moreover, doing such tasks builds such essential skills for me in the future. Since I have desire of studying abroad, this helps has helped me not to be afraid of living abroad.
To sum up, sharing household tasks with parents should not be evaluated by money Since these tasks mean appreciating our parents’ efforts and being responsible. I hope that all parents try to bring up their children in an effective way which benefits their children just. This aim will not be gained unless through paying attention to the result of their behaviors.
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Sentence: Controversry exists over whether children should get money from their parents in turn of their helps with household tasks or not.
Description: An adjective is not usually followed by a verb, present tense, 3rd person singular
Suggestion: Refer to Controversry and exists
Sentence: This values more than money for them.
Description: A determiner/pronoun, singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to This and values
giving money as reward for children while they become involved in hosechores create strong motivation for children
giving money as reward ... creates strong motivations for children
their contribution have more value than money.
their contributions have more value than money.
the bond among family members will be strengthen.
the bond among family members will be strengthened.
Helping my mother has learned me not to spend my times in front of TV
Helping my mother has taught me not to spend my times in front of TV
many health problem such a
many health problems such a
this helps has helped me
this help has helped me
Sentence: Although some people are of the opinion that giving money as reward for children while they become involved in hosechores create strong motivation for children to be more helpful, others believe that this approach causes children to be used to geeting money even in turn of doing even negligible tasks.
Error: hosechores Suggestion: house chores
Error: geeting Suggestion: getting
Sentence: They know that if thye take such responsibilities, their parents have more times to allocate for them so that they can talk about various issues such as their emotional or academic problems.
Error: thye Suggestion: they
Sentence: Nowadays, it is common for all children to waste their valuable times in front of either computer games ot TV programs.
Error: ot Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: If they get involved in daily taks, they can make the best use of their times.
Error: taks Suggestion: task
Sentence: For example, I can rememeber when I was a 8-year-old girl, I used to buy bread for my family.
Error: rememeber Suggestion: remember
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 8 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 6 2
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 19 in 30
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 8 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 6 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 417 350
No. of Characters: 1943 1500
No. of Different Words: 218 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.519 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.659 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.374 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 129 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 85 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 56 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 27 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.955 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.85 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.409 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.298 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.468 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.106 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5