Question :Some people like to keep a record of their own experiences by uploading pictures and other information to social-networking sites. Other people prefer not to create such records.Which approach do you prefer, and why?
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
People have differing views with regard to the whether sharing their experiences through social medias or not. While in some ways it may seem a positive approach, I believe that sharing or recording person's events by this means has a far more drawbacks.
The first reason is that creating a media profile where there are individual's pictures or other information might invade person's privacy. nowadays, technological development motivate most population to use various aspects of it. one aspect is extant connection through the internet by using numerous application such as Facebook. In the sense that person's are constantly being controlled by other people or even by private security firm would obviously be intrusive. in another words, user might feels his or her activity, in the long term, curtail own freedom.
Another subtle point is that using social- network sites in order to sharing and recording person's feelings or experience may have some positive effects for some reasons. Firstly, it could provides a situation that everyone use these media and see others information whenever or wherever is convinient. Secondly, it offers a open access to anybody who is willing to take part in this occation, regardless of age or background. on the contrary, users may not have the opportunity to engage fae-to-face with their friends or followers and will instead have to rely on virtual form of communication restricted to chatting through website forum. At a same time, they cannot discuse and exchange their ideas around those shared or recored information effectively. consequently, these website forum are poor substitude for recording and sharing information through traditional form.
in conclusion, It is clear to me that sharing or recording person's information through online social sites is niether appropriate approach nor is a good substitude of traditional form of interaction.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 139, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Nowadays
...formation might invade persons privacy. nowadays, technological development motivate mos...
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Line 3, column 468, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: In
...rity firm would obviously be intrusive. in another words, user might feels his or ...
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Line 5, column 190, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'could' requires the base form of the verb: 'provide'
Suggestion: provide
...cts for some reasons. Firstly, it could provides a situation that everyone use these med...
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Line 5, column 324, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...ever is convinient. Secondly, it offers a open access to anybody who is willing t...
^
Line 5, column 324, Rule ID: A_UNCOUNTABLE[3]
Message: Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply 'open access'.
Suggestion: open access
...ever is convinient. Secondly, it offers a open access to anybody who is willing to take part ...
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Line 5, column 428, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: On
...ation, regardless of age or background. on the contrary, users may not have the op...
^^
Line 5, column 760, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Consequently
...red or recored information effectively. consequently, these website forum are poor substitud...
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Line 5, column 774, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this website' or 'these websites'?
Suggestion: this website; these websites
... information effectively. consequently, these website forum are poor substitude for recording...
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Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: In
...nformation through traditional form. in conclusion, It is clear to me that shar...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
consequently, first, firstly, if, may, second, secondly, so, while, in conclusion, such as, on the contrary, with regard to
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 15.1003584229 86% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 9.8082437276 92% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 13.8261648746 123% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 24.0 43.0788530466 56% => OK
Preposition: 37.0 52.1666666667 71% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 8.0752688172 173% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1610.0 1977.66487455 81% => OK
No of words: 297.0 407.700716846 73% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.42087542088 4.8611393121 112% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.15134772569 4.48103885553 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.90912598183 2.67179642975 109% => OK
Unique words: 186.0 212.727598566 87% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.626262626263 0.524837075471 119% => OK
syllable_count: 507.6 618.680645161 82% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.51630824373 112% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 9.59856630824 63% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 20.6003584229 68% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 35.8651812276 48.9658058833 73% => OK
Chars per sentence: 115.0 100.406767564 115% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.2142857143 20.6045352989 103% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.78571428571 5.45110844103 161% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 9.0 5.5376344086 163% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 11.8709677419 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.243639448398 0.236089414692 103% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0760922744032 0.076458572812 100% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0515775699398 0.0737576698707 70% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.141604871595 0.150856017488 94% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0122366383457 0.0645574589148 19% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.7 11.7677419355 125% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 41.7 58.1214874552 72% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 10.1575268817 125% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.16 10.9000537634 130% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.84 8.01818996416 123% => OK
difficult_words: 97.0 86.8835125448 112% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.