Nowadays, public health and health food are topics particularly in vogue. Indeed, obesity still remains one of the most important problems in the USA. I support the idea that, a way to stimulate an healthy lifestyle, is to ban junk food. Therefore, I firmly encourage the emanation of a legislative decree, aiming to place a tax on the junk food as well as on fatty snacks.
In first instance, health is the most important thing we have. Staying healthy means that we are strong, we do not get ill often, we can work, managing our life and doing whatever we desire. Whether you agree or not, it is universally recognized that a bad health has an impact on every aspect of our daily routine. We get sick more frequently, we are not confident as we should be as we do not fit well on our own clothes. As if this was not enough, taking care of ourselves, keeping in shape and avoiding junk food should be part of our duties as citizens.
A second reason in favor of this opinion, is that when we are sick we might need hospitalization and medical assistance and exams are very expensive. Hospitalization requires high costs and resources. We should not damage our health with wrong eating habits. Even if, a tax on junk food and fatty snacks might seem an extreme resolution, I believe that a changeover is required in order to spread healthy habits among all the population levels. Some might say that, this is not the right way to proceed as the country can not manipulate people eating behaviours. I do not agree because I think that some people display an eating misconduct and they should be educated and addressed to eat in a different and healthier manner.
By introducing a new tax, the use of rubbish food will be discouraged with a double effect: on a side, people will lose weight, gaining health; on the other the country will spend less money in public health. Another positive outcome will be that the country will have the chance to invest the money saved in helping patients who are in real need.
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flaws:
In the second paragraph, what is the relationship between staying healthy and a tax on the junk food. It is not clear.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 22 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 360 350
No. of Characters: 1607 1500
No. of Different Words: 193 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.356 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.464 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.498 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 114 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 68 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 42 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 30 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.176 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.445 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.471 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.317 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.521 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.127 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5