Some parents offer their school age children money for each high grade mark they get in school Do you think this is a good idea Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer

Parents have different aproach to encourage their childeren to study and get a good score. Some give money, some give previlage to something, but some disagree with any rewards for the score. I personally beleive that hardworking and learning are important part of the education not just scores and disagree with the idea of giving money for getting good score. I provide 3 reason to support my idea.
Firstly, education and learning is a process and just scores are not the final point of education. Many students with good scores just memorize the subjects instead of learning the objectives thouroughly. On the other hand, there are students who did their hardwork but get lower score but their perseverance paid off but they did some stupid mistake which led to lower score. Therfore, hardworking and perseverance should be encouraged to build the skills not just scores.
Also, students are esponsible for their study and they should underestand that they do not study for the money or make their parents happy and proud. Instead, they should study for finding good skills and knowledge to use them in their future life when they are independent and on their own. Therefore giving money and reward ruins the concept of education and learning.
Finally, school age childeren are not able to manage their money well and they might spoiled or use it inappropriately. For example, using for cigarret or some other stuff. So, any reward that they need should be provided by their family or supervised with them.
In conclusion, although parents like to encourage their childeren for getting good score, it has drawbacks. Not only it devaluate the education and hardworking, but also have the message that they are not responsible for their study and for good grade they did a mercy to their family. Not to mention that money in young age could be harmful.

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Average: 6.1 (1 vote)
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 195, Rule ID: PRP_RB_NO_VB[1]
Message: Are you missing a verb?
...agree with any rewards for the score. I personally beleive that hardworking and learning are impor...
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Line 3, column 79, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...r study and they should underestand that they do not study for the money or make ...
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Line 3, column 295, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Therefore,
... they are independent and on their own. Therefore giving money and reward ruins the conce...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 120, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'devaluates'?
Suggestion: devaluates
...od score, it has drawbacks. Not only it devaluate the education and hardworking, but also...
^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, firstly, if, so, therefore, well, for example, in conclusion, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 15.1003584229 73% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 24.0 13.8261648746 174% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 34.0 43.0788530466 79% => OK
Preposition: 28.0 52.1666666667 54% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1548.0 1977.66487455 78% => OK
No of words: 312.0 407.700716846 77% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.96153846154 4.8611393121 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.20279927342 4.48103885553 94% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.55498378534 2.67179642975 96% => OK
Unique words: 151.0 212.727598566 71% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.483974358974 0.524837075471 92% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 478.8 618.680645161 77% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 9.59856630824 42% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.94265232975 40% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 40.7573628901 48.9658058833 83% => OK
Chars per sentence: 91.0588235294 100.406767564 91% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.3529411765 20.6045352989 89% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.23529411765 5.45110844103 114% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.298688834803 0.236089414692 127% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.106332735501 0.076458572812 139% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0637304013649 0.0737576698707 86% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.187039489633 0.150856017488 124% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0631424969958 0.0645574589148 98% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.1 11.7677419355 94% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 58.1214874552 106% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 10.1575268817 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.49 10.9000537634 105% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.87 8.01818996416 98% => OK
difficult_words: 66.0 86.8835125448 76% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200

Rates: 61.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.