Some young adults wants independence from their parents as soon as possible. Other young adults prefer to live with their families for a longer time. Which of these situations do you think is better? Use specifics reasons and examples to support your opin

As a matter of fact, every person likes to have a comfortable life. Achieving goals is not hard for many people, but they need to know some rules in their life. Being independent is one of the most important things in human's life. Surprisingly, many of young adults want to be separate as soon as possible, because they want to do everything that they want. I personally prefer to be independent as fast as possible.
Firs and fore most, being mature is an essential factor in people's life. Students in college age are looking for new experiences. They want to try everything and choose between them. Researchers in the Irvine University did a research about this topic and they found out that more than 80 percent of teens like to be separate, because they want to experience new things and decide by theirselves. Irvine scientists published their essay in their website at 2008.
Second, trying to live with another person out of family would be a really good experience for children. They can learn many things by their roommates. In many case, parents do not tell their children everything. Consequently, their children will not find their issues. In another word, parents try to keep their child's confidence, so they avoid of saying some bad things. On the other hand, their roommates do not have any emotional relationship with them, so they can get some perfect feedback to each other.
Last but not least, network expanding would be so important for student's future. For example, a guy with many friends can find a job faster compare with another guy without any network in most of times. Having many friends is another aspect of this choice. Young adults will create many relationship with other outside the home. They have enough freedom and time to find new friends. They would find their partner in these kinds of situations.
To sum up, although being around family is comfortable for both side, many young adults prefer to find their own way to success.

Votes
Average: 6 (1 vote)
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 225, Rule ID: A_UNCOUNTABLE[1]
Message: Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply 'research'.
Suggestion: research
...esearchers in the Irvine University did a research about this topic and they found out tha...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 156, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun case seems to be countable; consider using: 'many cases'.
Suggestion: many cases
...earn many things by their roommates. In many case, parents do not tell their children eve...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 512, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...et some perfect feedback to each other. Last but not least, network expanding wo...
^^^
Line 4, column 189, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'most of', you should use 'the' ('most of the times') or simply say ''most times''.
Suggestion: most of the times; most times
...with another guy without any network in most of times. Having many friends is another aspect ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 283, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun relationship seems to be countable; consider using: 'many relationships'.
Suggestion: many relationships
...f this choice. Young adults will create many relationship with other outside the home. They have ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, consequently, if, look, really, second, so, for example, as a matter of fact, to sum up, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 15.1003584229 93% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 9.8082437276 92% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 13.8261648746 51% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 2.0 11.0286738351 18% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 30.0 43.0788530466 70% => OK
Preposition: 51.0 52.1666666667 98% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.0752688172 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1635.0 1977.66487455 83% => OK
No of words: 338.0 407.700716846 83% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.83727810651 4.8611393121 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.28774723029 4.48103885553 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.52671036267 2.67179642975 95% => OK
Unique words: 181.0 212.727598566 85% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.53550295858 0.524837075471 102% => OK
syllable_count: 492.3 618.680645161 80% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 9.59856630824 73% => OK
Interrogative: 0.0 0.994623655914 0% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.6003584229 112% => OK
Sentence length: 14.0 20.1344086022 70% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 38.6069819439 48.9658058833 79% => OK
Chars per sentence: 71.0869565217 100.406767564 71% => OK
Words per sentence: 14.6956521739 20.6045352989 71% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.82608695652 5.45110844103 89% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.5376344086 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8709677419 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.262429987101 0.236089414692 111% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.079794245844 0.076458572812 104% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0614260148783 0.0737576698707 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.159776084045 0.150856017488 106% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0534131383488 0.0645574589148 83% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 8.7 11.7677419355 74% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 65.73 58.1214874552 113% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.6 10.1575268817 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.2 10.9000537634 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.13 8.01818996416 89% => OK
difficult_words: 60.0 86.8835125448 69% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 6.0 10.002688172 60% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 7.6 10.0537634409 76% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.