TPO-15 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? In order to become financially responsible adults, children should learn to manage their own money at young age. Use specific reasons and examples to support your ans

In the twentieth century, people are attracted to the luxurious life and money play a vital role in every person life. Although it is not ideal for everyone, some people believe that people should know the value of the currency at the young age and others not. Personally, I am off convicted that I do not believe that children should know about financial management at the young age because they are not matured and that is the age for study not for earning money.
First, knowledge is divine and that should learn first at the young age. If the children start to manage their fees, they cannot focus on their education and they might not be in a good position in the future. For example, when I was studying high school at Omak public school, I have a friend Alex. Every day he used to work at the coffee shop and he did not get enough time to concentrate on studies, as a result, he got fewer grades although he got money he took extra two years to complete his schooling. While, if their parents support him for studies, he might get better grades and he probably save two years time.
Second, children are not enough knowledge about money saving. If we give some amount to the kids, they usually spend that for snacks or some other kind of the junk foods most of the time; it doesn’t mean that they waste money in their future. For example, when I was young, my parents use to give pocket money. Most of the time I was wasted that amount for junk food because I do not know the value. However, when I become an adult, I never wasted single penny for unnecessarily because I know the value. So, it all depends on the situation that what are facing when we are grown up. So, teaching money management to the children would not impact their future.
In some, although it is important for everyone to know the importance of the money. Overall, for children should only focus on their studies not to distract with other activities.

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Average: 6 (1 vote)
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 299, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Every
...ak public school, I have a friend Alex. every day he used to work at the coffee shop ...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 62, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: For
...ot enough knowledge about money saving. for example, when I was young, my parents u...
^^^
Line 3, column 104, Rule ID: USE_TO_VERB[1]
Message: Did you mean 'used'?
Suggestion: used
...r example, when I was young, my parents use to give pocket money. Most of the time ...
^^^
Line 3, column 324, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: So
...unnecessarily because I know the value. so, it all depends on the situation that w...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, however, if, second, so, for example, in contrast, as a result

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 15.1003584229 86% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 13.8261648746 51% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 38.0 43.0788530466 88% => OK
Preposition: 32.0 52.1666666667 61% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1413.0 1977.66487455 71% => OK
No of words: 314.0 407.700716846 77% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.5 4.8611393121 93% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.20951839842 4.48103885553 94% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.32706681665 2.67179642975 87% => OK
Unique words: 162.0 212.727598566 76% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.515923566879 0.524837075471 98% => OK
syllable_count: 444.6 618.680645161 72% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 8.0 3.51792114695 227% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 20.6003584229 78% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 44.2110969526 48.9658058833 90% => OK
Chars per sentence: 88.3125 100.406767564 88% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.625 20.6045352989 95% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.625 5.45110844103 85% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 11.8709677419 59% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.20710197822 0.236089414692 88% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0728039768303 0.076458572812 95% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0530905877061 0.0737576698707 72% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.127243289834 0.150856017488 84% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0243390985491 0.0645574589148 38% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.6 11.7677419355 82% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 69.11 58.1214874552 119% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.3 10.1575268817 82% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 8.82 10.9000537634 81% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.34 8.01818996416 92% => OK
difficult_words: 55.0 86.8835125448 63% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 10.002688172 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.