TPO-16 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The best way to travel is in a group led by a tour guide. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Mostly, all around the word, Summer is the time for family vacations and parents make trip plans. The struggle is about whether going on a trip on their own or traveling in a group led by a tour guide. I am of the conviction that travel by a group led by tour guide provides us a safer, inexpensive and easier trip.

First, I believe that traveling groups are safer and members are protected by leaders. we can see traveling groups even in forests, to illustrate this take animals for an example, most of the animals prefer group movements to be safe from predator attacks. Human also fallow their nature, passengers in a traveling groups are as safe as a group of animals in forests. passengers will be faced lots of dangers, include thieves and murderers and so on, a leader could guide them in unfamiliar destination cities.

Furthermore, I certainly advocate that reduction of financial levels are caused by traveling groups. Leaders always obtain sales through trips because they bring a group of passengers to places like hotels, museums and so on. Consider a hotel as an example, the hotel manager offers leaders big sales and reduction of suit costs in order to encourage them to reserves lots of suits for a traveling groups. In a sense, the manager prefers lower yields but in significantly more scales. So, leaders sell tickets cheaper than individual tickets in order to attract more passengers. Also, leaders rent vans as transportation vehicles which significantly reduce the trip budget levels.

Last but not least, I think that travel in a group is easier. In a group trip, passengers have leaders who guide them appropriately. The leaders take passengers to all historically precious places, while they describe sculpture stories and building stories. Also, leaders know all bazaar which passengers can have better purchases there.

To sum up, I certainly advocate that travel in a group led by tour guide is a wisdom choice because in this way passengers are safer, it costs less and through that you travel easier. I think that it is Better to use other experiences to find your tour.

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Average: 7 (3 votes)
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 88, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: We
...r and members are protected by leaders. we can see traveling groups even in forest...
^^
Line 3, column 369, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Passengers
... safe as a group of animals in forests. passengers will be faced lots of dangers, include ...
^^^^^^^^^^

Discourse Markers used:
['also', 'but', 'first', 'furthermore', 'if', 'so', 'while', 'i think', 'to sum up']

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.294710327456 0.229887763892 128% => OK
Verbs: 0.148614609572 0.158761421928 94% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0604534005038 0.0866891130778 70% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0528967254408 0.046263068375 114% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0478589420655 0.0685040099705 70% => OK
Prepositions: 0.133501259446 0.118717715034 112% => OK
Participles: 0.0302267002519 0.0351676179071 86% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.69508257646 2.67179642975 101% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0251889168766 0.0309702414327 81% => OK
Particles: 0.00251889168766 0.00188951952338 133% => OK
Determiners: 0.0856423173804 0.0887237588012 97% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0100755667506 0.0209618222197 48% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.00755667506297 0.0139019557991 54% => OK

Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2114.0 2387.08602151 89% => OK
No of words: 357.0 408.028673835 87% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.92156862745 5.86048508987 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.34677393335 4.48200974243 97% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.375350140056 0.338922669872 111% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.274509803922 0.251872472559 109% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.162464985994 0.174417080927 93% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.109243697479 0.112833075102 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.69508257646 2.67179642975 101% => OK
Unique words: 190.0 212.727598566 89% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.532212885154 0.524397521467 101% => OK
Word variations: 57.6648129534 59.2087087015 97% => OK
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6684587814 92% => OK
Sentence length: 18.7894736842 20.5533526081 91% => OK
Sentence length SD: 35.3660713505 48.84282405 72% => OK
Chars per sentence: 111.263157895 120.699889404 92% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.7894736842 20.5533526081 91% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.473684210526 0.644075263715 74% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.5376344086 110% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.54480286738 36% => OK
Readability: 46.2404540764 45.7405998639 101% => OK
Elegance: 1.83838383838 1.45489161554 126% => OK

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.300388472633 0.300154397459 100% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.109175553257 0.103427244359 106% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0847329274156 0.0752933317313 113% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.507765114836 0.497263757937 102% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.137776740828 0.151897553556 91% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.107902694783 0.114077575197 95% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0687061552724 0.0781384742642 88% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.262157222945 0.336927656856 78% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0665295027277 0.067059652881 99% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.199730461771 0.210909579961 95% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0742027505726 0.0618886996521 120% => OK

Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 11.8870967742 101% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.86379928315 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.91756272401 81% => OK
Positive topic words: 11.0 8.42114695341 131% => OK
Negative topic words: 2.0 2.4623655914 81% => OK
Neutral topic words: 3.0 2.75985663082 109% => OK
Total topic words: 16.0 13.6433691756 117% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

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Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

flaws:
1. Better to talk some advantages of traveling alone too, like: more freedom or privacy. But still goes back to support traveling by a group. Like this:

Para 1: introduction. my choice: A or B. agree or disagree. (suppose we support side A)

Para 2: First, reason 1 (1 sentence) + why reason 1(some arguments. 2-3 sentences) + examples for reason 1 (around 1 sentences) + small conclusions (like advantages of reason 1 or comparisons if not reason 1, 1-2 sentences).

Para 3: Second, reason 2, blabla... do the same thing as First

Para 4: Admittedly, there are some advantages of side B. first,....second...However, there is no causation/relation... Still I support side A, ...first,....second...

Para 5: Conclusion.

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2. No. of Different Words: 180 200 //more Different Words wanted

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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 22 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 357 350
No. of Characters: 1703 1500
No. of Different Words: 180 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.347 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.77 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.637 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 126 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 87 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 50 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 39 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.358 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.706 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.351 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.584 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.171 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5

thank you for your evaluation and excellent advises , I have some question about para 4 "However, there is no causation/relation... Still I support side A, ...first,....second..." what do you mean by relation? after I support side A, for first and second reasons, must we repeat our previous reasons?

No, Reason 3 should be a brand new reason. it should be like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1
para 3: reason 2
para 4: reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

while we like to make some style changes in reason 3, if not, it is going to repeat the same structure like reason 1 and reason 2 . Reason 3 can be something like:

Admittedly, there are some advantages of travel alone like it has more freedom and privacy. However, freedom and privacy are also available in a group trip. for example, the group can leave extra two hours for those who like to see other spots...

or:
A survey by Harvard University in 2006 told that 80% people choose group travel because it is more safe....